"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Don't Look Down....

Lately I feel like my mind has left me. I don't really understand what is going on. I feel like a total screw up at work. Nothing I touch works. Nothing I do seems right. I finished a bunch of work on our website while my boss was out of town, thinking she would be happy when she got back that I was caught up, and everything was up-to-date.

She couldn't for some reason, open the files I have online. I can, and their in the same format as always. I normally think I am smart, but lately I just feel dumb.

I am also not doing that well with exercise and diet. And today is weigh in day. Yippee. It's totally depressing. Like, one area of my life can't just be wrong, it has to be everything?
I feel like I will never get out of my credit card debt. I am working two jobs and it seems like I will never be able to quit. 7 months and counting....this was going to be for 3 months you know. Here I am.....7 months later.

I filled out a loan application. Figured out my gross pay from both jobs.......WTF??
I am disgusted now that I see how much I make and I am having problems? My bills are paid but why can't I make it work?

"It is looking down, that makes us dizzy"

Which is true. So, I am snapping out of the negative mood. I know better than that. I know that you have to have a positive attitude to feel positive. I'm trying to shake this off and get on with life. If i start feeling down, I'll fall down! It is always when I look up at the sky that I have those moments of clarity.

Today is the last day of the month for the weight loss challenge. Will post results after lunch, we should know the winner.....Stressssssss!!!! Wish me luck!

Today's Question(s):

What was your best experience in school?

This would have to be when I was student of the month my senior year. I was totally shocked. I still wear my Tshirt proudly to this day! (to bed!)

What is the most disturbing poverty you have ever seen?

Only thing I have seen 'in person' is in Cancun. We had to go get a western union money transfer, and had to go to the 'other side' of the island. People lived in boxes, there was a community of people, living in boxes. It was like, a box town. It was really sad because the resort area is really nice.

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