"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Where Work Gets in the Way....

I was pretty sad today, when during workout #2, I see on the 5:00 news that my future husband #3, (Right behind Edwin McCain, and Jason Stathom) Matthew Fox (Jack Shepherd, and Charlie Salenger!!!) was a mere stones throw away from my very own apartment, filming with Tyler Perry in the new movie about a series of James Patterson books I love about Alex Cross! Perry is Alex Cross? ( I always pictured as a sexy Blair Underwood, and in the past was played by Morgan Freeman...really, movie makers? Didn't you read these books??)

This is a sign that I should read the local paper like a real adult.

I could have totally taken vacation. I have a week left with nothing to do, and no promising proposals on the horizon. I could have innocently walked Mr. Magoo down to the cemetary, and peeped some celebrities, if even from afar. I could have walked the same street he walked.

Sure, they also filmed at Stan Hewitt, which I attend once a year in October for the craft fair, and enjoy hot cider, and hot fresh gingerbread cookies. Or on the occasion that a friend gets married there. But, I can't walk there in minutes like I could at the cemetary. Just thinking they were so close, makes me want to cry.

Yes, Clevelanders, most of this is filmed in your city, but nothing ever happens in Akron. This is the biggest thing since that one rock lady opened the vegan restaurant downtown!


I'm just not meant to get married yet. I think he'll wait for me.

But, I swear, if I see the lunatic lady that lives across from me, and wears duct tape on her mouth in the movie, I will just die.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Adele - ''Someone Like You''

Just when you think its safe to listen to sad songs again, and you are over "him" something comes along and knocks you back down....I found this to be such a tear jerker last night on the VMA's, and while it makes me incredibly sad to listen to it, I just can't stop. It speaks to me.

Thursday, August 25, 2011


I had a particularly trying day at work today, being the boss sometimes takes a toll on you. You spend your time taking on everyone else's problems, and its easy to get caught up in what they are thinking and feeling.

Mr. Magoo gave me a lesson in Zen tonight. With all his past struggles in life, he is perfectly content to lay on my couch, totally unaware of what happened to him in the past.

He is living in the moment, safe, and secure, as we all should be.

In this moment, he his healthy, and safe, and loved in his home.

And, so am I.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Call Me Forrest..

Today I ran my first 8 consecutive miles, outside.

I ran. Like, the entire time. I didn't even have to stop.

Almost 3 of those miles were in the rain. My girlfriend told me it would make us feel bad-ass for not quitting, but I just felt wet, and sticky, and my pants got all stretched out from the rain, so I had to keep pulling them up to my boobs like Ed Grimley.

And my butt cheeks were freezing.

And I think my feet were pickled at about mile 5.

The first 6 were fairly easy, which surprised the hell out of me.

The last two I had to push myself to complete. My girlfriend kept telling me "it's only two miles anyone can run two miles, we'll be done in 20 minutes". I wanted to tell her to shut up, but she's one of my oldest friends, and she meant well. And no one offered to carry me on their backs so I had to keep going.

I didn't feel bad-ass per se, but I do feel good for completing it.

Now, laying around on the couch for the rest of the day wont make me feel so bad.

Did I mention that my bathroom is on the second floor? That's a lotta steps for these tired legs to make.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Looks Like We Made It...

I was finally featured on my boot camp's website. I feel official now!!! And having a good "measuring stick" from the start actually makes me feel accomplished!

Here is my testimonial! I lost 61lbs in 20 weeks! A size 14 to a size 6!!!!

Why did you join (Boot Camp)?

Because I had been working out on my own for years, and stopped losing

weight after 45lbs. I stopped pushing myself, and needed motivation.

I was also (which is my favorite phrase from my instructor) "working out just

to eat" I needed structure to what I was putting into my body.

How did you feel your first week?

Awful! I took a lot of hot baths, did a lot of stretching,

and had plenty of ibuprofen! I remember thinking I would throw up

during each class, and I think even my hair was sore!

How has your eating habits changed?

Drastically! I actually enjoy eating healthy, because of the way

it makes me feel. The couple times I splurged, made me feel awful.

You really are what you eat, but if you don't allow your body to

adjust to the healthy food, you never realize that! I have structured

meals and snacks, and feel fulfilled!

What is your favorite exercise?

Jacks. Only because at first, they hurt every part of my body, and

I struggled with just a few sets. Now they continue to be challenging,

but I can do more, and feel the benefit of the cardio more than the

pain of the movements. It's a measuring stick for my fitness.

What advice would you give someone who is thinking

about joining?

Do it! The workouts are great, and it forces you to push yourself

further than you think you can go. You always leave feeling

accomplished! It  has made me feel amazing about my body and what it

can do. It's also a place you can go where you know people understand

your struggle with workouts, and changing your eating habits.

What advice would you give someone new to the


Follow the meal plan religiously, as hard as it is at first,

and after the first month it will become habit. It gets easier

to turn down sweets and  snacks the longer you stick with it.

I never gave anything long enough to work, and trust me, it works!

How would you describe the classes?

The classes are high energy, and fun! Your instructor always

has a new challenge for you to try, and it doesn't get boring like

some classes, its never the same routine.

How has (Boot Camp) Changed your life?

I have turned into someone I never thought I could be. Someone

who makes smart choices about what I eat, and looks forward to work

outs, and calorie burning. I have also started running 5 miles a day

(which even I can't believe), and I'm doing the Akron marathon on

a relay team in September. I never would have began running if

my fitness level wasn't increased with the help of boot camp,

and I certainly never would have thought I'd be doing a marathon.

Friday, August 12, 2011

An Ode to My Vessel..

Happiness is, calculating your height/weight ratio, and the return says "you are 18lbs overweight".

Only 18lbs? Ha! That's nothin! I'm gonna kick your ass 18 lbs! I have 10% more body fat to lose to be in the normal range too. That's a far cry from having to drop 25%!!!

Tonight only two of us showed up to bootcamp. The instructor asked what we wanted to do. I said "lose a pound!" That's not such a great idea, because she really worked us over!

My body is awesome. Not in the "I'm so fine" way, but in the way that it's just an amazing thing!

For so long I told it that it was fat, and lazy, and couldn't do this or that. I changed my thinking, and I said nice things to myself, and little by little, I lived up to my words.

This week, after 20 weeks of the same workout routine, and diet.... my body managed to drop 6lbs!!! I simply started my runs on a slight incline for a longer period of time!

And!.....I am officially doing the Akron marathon, in a relay. It's my first time, so I am taking the second to easiest route, of 3.5 miles. I'm starting the first leg, as my girlfriend thinks this will make me become addicted, and do all the marathons she does.

I'm kinda scared, but the best part is Luigi's pizza afterwords. I miss pizza! And pizza misses me!

I'd like to thank my body, for living up to my expectations, and continuing to surprise me!

I am now at a total weight loss of 61lbs in 20 weeks. (106lbs total since my highest weight....OVER A HUNNNNNDRED POUNDS!!!!). I bought a size 6 dress pants, (SIX) size 8 jeans, and a small top this week. I really can't believe it, because when I look at pictures, I think I still look big. I only realize the change if I look at "fat" pictures. I really never expected to get this far but every time I meet a goal, it seems to come easier, and I set a new one!

Only 10lbs until my second goal is hit. And after that, who knows, I may just be sporting a bikini next summer! (I havn't done that since I was 16!!!) Which is awesome, because I plan to visit my girlfriend in Florida (for the first time) and she is taking me to the pacific ocean. I've never been!!!! I'm sheltered!

I've said it a million times, I feel amazing!

Tuesday, August 09, 2011

Puppy Mills are for Assholes...My PSA!

I took Mr. Magoo for a walk this past weekend, and one thing shih-poos (and all short snouted dogs for that matter) are not cut out for, is heat.

My little guy pooped out in the heat and started showing signs of heat exhaustion, plopping down on his side and panting so hard he could barely catch his breath. *panic*

Being the good mommy I am, I rushed him home into a cool bath and air conditioning. Normally my Magoo isn't much a fan of bath time, but here he is chillin like a villian in a cool bath, completely trusting that I know what the hell I am doing!

This picture shows he is miles away from the first five years of his life....that of cage confinement, being forced to "perform" with the ladies, and being treated like a paycheck instead of the amazing little man he is. He was on his way to being shot by the people who used him, because he no longer "performed" as he should.

I wish people would stop buying pet store dogs, and realize the horrific life that the parents of those cute "puppies in the window" are forced to endure. He never knew love, a bath, medical care, brushing, bathing, play, toys, treats, or even real food, which his poor teeth are now paying the price for.

(well, actually, my job is paying the price for those teeth...)

And I gave him his name because he has little a blind right eye. Which when he visited my vet, was found to be blind not by birth, but due to a puncture he suffered as a puppy that was never treated. How cruel.

He is such a sweet dog, and I am so lucky to have rescued him.

Mister Magoodle was adopted several times and returned pre-maturely because he didn't "click" with the new owners after a few days. Puppy mill rescues take more time, understanding, and patience in the beginning, but what you get in return is priceless. I am Mr. Magoo's world. He follows me around just like a baby duck, and looks up to me in a way that warms my heart, and who doesn't want to feel like that?

I will never forget the first time he was rambunctious, and enjoyed a good play session, (playing tag in the hallway) or even the first time taking a treat (BACON!!!) from me, was a lot of work!

I have been on both sides, and having bought a dog at a pet store, that spent 15 years of her life riddled with health problems, made me change my ways. I kind of feel like Magoo is my karma, I am making up for a bad choice...but somehow, I am still the one that wins.

Knowing where he came from and seeing the amazing pet he is now, is all because I gave him a chance. I really feel like he rescued me just as much as I rescued him.

After buying a "used" dog, I'll never go puppy again. But, many rescues are lucky to not only rescue the puppy mill parents, but their babies too. So if you are thinking about a dog, save a life, or at least, buy from a responsible breeder, not the pet store.

What "they" say is true. You will feel amazing about the decision you made!

And visit one of a kind pets. They do amazing rescue work, grooming, and hold at cost shot clinics for your pets, all which benefit the rescue of amazing animals like Magoo!

Saturday, August 06, 2011

Kiss, sort of!

I spent my Friday evening with some friends, and a cute boy, at the river front to see a Kiss tribute band.

One thing I love about living in Akron, is every weekend either at Lock 3 or Riverfront, there is free entertainment, and that means free parking too. It's nice to see my tax dollars hard at work, unlike when I lived in the country, where my tax dollars paid for the unsolicited harassment of innocent people by the podunk police department.

One thing I love about vodka, is that if you have enough before you go see a tribute band, you actually think it's the real deal. For instance, in this photo, I was soooo excited to meet the kitty kat guy in kiss, and I wanted a picture. I couldn't believe I got to meet him!

Obviously, I had enough vodka to make me think this was the kitty kat guy too. I was kinda let down when I looked at my pictures today. Vodka for president!

Sidenote: rock stars are really sweaty. This guy stank. I never washed my Edwin McCain T-shirt he signed, and sweated all over for our photo op either, because to me, Edwin's sweat can cure cancer. (um his new album drops August 30th, you know you want to buy it!)

I learned a few things this night, TDH is really good at taking care of drunk me, for instance when I totally bailed on him to jump on stage for photo ops with the band, without even looking back, I found him sitting in a seat holding my purse. He also held my hand, and saved me from running into traffic to cross the street, when the alcohol made me think the timing was perfect.

Really, I don't ask for much, it's the little things!

Finally, he survived a night with my crazy-fun girlfriends, who felt the need to text me first thing in the morning and apologize for being "assholes". To which he replied "I don't think they were assholes, they were alot of fun".

I think I might go out with him again.

Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Tooth Hell...

I bet you thought I was dead, and went to tooth hell, right?

I had a root canal. Oh I've heard how everyone thinks they are easy cheesy, but most people are not me, thanks. Two and a half short hours later....it's over. It wasn't pleasant. Of course I'm in sincere pain for days, and taking 2,000 mg of antibiotics. Great first root canal. I sure hope I get to have another!

Mr. Magoodle, the cutest shih-poodle in the world, makes me smile! Who wouldn't want to wake up to this each morning?

Can we snooze some more Mom?

I learned to appreciate little Magoo and his cuteness, after spending a night with TDH and his very jealous black lab.

Who panted, and whined, and shoved his slobbery toy at me the entire time I was at his house. And then, he plopped his big ass in between us, and pushed me to the edge of the bed with his legs. I think I slept for like 2 hours. Like, no manners. Yes, dogs have manners!

I went home and kissed Magoo's sweet, quiet, content little face.

Speaking of animals, I got the best compliment today!

"You're a cat person, and you don't smell....." um....thanks?