"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort










Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Adolesence!...

FIFTY DAYS UNTIL I AM 30.

What else is good that's 50?

50 cent.

According to Entertainment Weekly, 50 is the new 30 where television viewing is concerned.

50 states. (actually isn't there 51? don't laugh, math, geography = things I don't know shit about!)

50 first dates. An ok movie.

50/50 A kind of raffle that you get scammed on cus you never win.

The great 50 days that starts the day after Easter.

Penecost means 50. We use to go to a Penecostal church. So, I went to a 50 church?

I think that 30 is going to be sorta like, having sex for the first time. Or, getting your period. Or, growing boobs. You hear all the hype, and when it finally happens to you, your like, ummmm what was all the fuss about???? helloooo?

God, can you make my turning 30 more like having sex for the first time, than gettin' my period? I much preferred the having sex for the first time. It wasn't great, but it was something to brag about. No one really gave a shit when I got my period.

I remember it like it was yesterday. I was 12. (we're talking periods here NOT SEX!)
I was minding my own business, watching TV. I went pee, and there it was. My period. I had already been through family living, so I had a book about adolesence. I knew what a period was. It's when you need to buy a belt and sanitary napkins. (sure, we didn't have these in my day but my book said that was what I needed)

I didn't tell my mom, I showed her my toilet paper! AHHHH HAAAA! And, in my moms true nature she told her friend she was on the phone with, that she had to go because "Mon just started her period". I should have known that would be only the beginning of the embaressing things my mom would do. She did hug me. I didn't feel happy about it at all. Big deal! Never mind that I was still wearing a training bra, hot damn I got my period!

I still thought boys were gross. I was a late bloomer.

I'm pretty sure she told my brother too. Cus, sure, he needed to know! I don't however, remember when my terrible cramps started, but I suffered from them all through school. I'd miss days. I'd cry. I really had some doozies. I got em from my mom. THANKS MOM! She had them too. I use to get some good drugs for them back in the day. Then I got on the pill, and they went away almost completely. But, like most good things, there are drawbacks. I gained weight.

I also started birth control right before my senior prom. They made me sick to my stomach, and I had flu like symptoms for the prom. Good thing my mom accidentally exposed my film and I don't have 1 picture from the dance, cus I wasn't lookin to great anyways! I didn't get lucky prom night. I puked all night. Showed everyone my underwear as I fell out of the limo. Didn't eat the dinner I had to pay 30 bucks for either.

I am taking off 14 days of work in December. Great time for vacation! And when I say 'taking off' I really mean, still working, cus I get no time of my second job. I'm gonna call off a couple days of course, but thats besides the point. I dont care cus our incidents reset in January.
But, I get 3 wks vacation, and I have had to piss it all away this year, next year I'm enjoying it!
I can't wait to have time off work, and not working anywhere! It'll be such a special treat, I wont know what to do with myself!!!!!!!!!

Today's Question:

What is the biggest bribe you have ever taken? And given?

Bribery! Ummmm....my ex husband always bought me jewelry (on OUR credit card) when he was an especially big asshole to me. so I guess you can consider that a bribe.
I dont remember bribing anyone. Im sure I have but I cant remember.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I remember the 1st time I got my period, I was in 5th grade. I wore that stupid pad upside down, the wrong way. I didnt want to tell anyone, not even my mom! ha ha ha I hated it, I felt like everyone at school knew!
I cant think of a bribe, but I have heard that I am a damn good manipulator, so watch out!

MzAriez said...

Hi Mon.

What are you going to do on your "vacation"?

I have a month off between December and January. I was thinking Ohio, but might ask the best friend to journey here instead. Maybe I can bribe her????

Have a great night.

Fizzgig said...

MMMM. I'm doing nothing! I might visit my Mom and Sister in VA if I can get off work at my second job for 2 days. I'll get christmas shopping done, and drink, cus my bday is that week too!