"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Playing Catch Up!

Back to work. I was greeted by my coworker, with a list of things they needed me for and I wasnt here to do. I said sheesh, I was off for 3 days, not even a week! I also came in here last Thurs. to update our website, and no one thought it was done, I guess that was a big catastrophe. If anyone bothered to check online, I date our page for all to see when it is updated, and the page in fact, was updated Thursday. Um, on my day off. Kthx.

On my time off, I did get a lot of unpacking done. I also managed to smash my car up. The worst part is, it was into my friends car!!!! I feel absolutely horrible about it! I didnt think my car was messed up at first, but it sure is! The bumper is cracked, it was popped up on the side but i fixed that. the paint will come off the whole side (its plastic).

Went to Karaoke last Friday. I sang 'What it feels like for a girl' not a great choice, but a good song! Nothing worse than bombing, and not knowing if you should keep going. Needless to say I just drank more and I didn't care.

I sang with my friend, I hate myself for loving you. End of the night, when they brought the bar bill, found out that I had paid $4 for bottles of bud select....ummmmm that is highway robbery, and I dont think I'll be drinking at On Tap anymore! We stopped at the restaurant after the bar to eat, my brother made us some food, it was goooood! I got to bed at 5am that night. I still got it!!!

Saturday we went on the towpath trail by home. Me and the girls. My dog pooped out and I had to carry her for a while. She got into the canal to cool off. It was about 90 and steaming freaking hot! She hasnt been right ever since! Shes hot and lazy! Went to dinner, and to Sadie Renee's at night. There was about 20 people in the bar, all but a few were with the band. The band was good too! They played Evanesence, and Bon Jovi, etc...they were good.

Sunday, I went to see Star Wars with my brother. Boy, the movie was pretty depressing!! It was so sad to see that he did it all for love. SEE WHAT IT DOES TO YOU???? I Think that I might get me a black super suit to hide my identity, and ruin everyones lives that hurt me too!!! I can be Darth Terminator.....I'm starting with those we dont speak of! I had to keep telling myself that Obi Wan didn't die, because he's in the end movies....but still!!!

We went to eat at Applebee's. And we had a storm. Storms also remind me of the ass, because he was all into the weather, and I dont like storms, they scare me. I guess it was only a matter of time til it all caught up with me. I'm running out of things to keep me busy with unpacking? Who knows, but I know that I dont like it! I keep telling myself, if we were meant to be together, he would've asked me not to go, and that never once happened, so I'm better off! I am at the stage, where I'm second guessing my decision to leave. Only 3 months later! So I was upset over the ass all night! Cried! I read my old journals, and realized, that there were several times that he told me we werent going anywhere. I was just in denial. And, he also contradicted himself all the time with it!! I'm better off. Keep believing it.

So, its OVER! Im trying not to think of it and figure it out, because theres nothing to figure out!

I also had a nightmare Sunday! I dreamt that I had my ex husbands baby, and his mom was so happy we were back together. But I ended up not wanting the baby and trying to give it to him and leave. I have no maternal instincts. Please God, don't let that be my fate. I deserve better than my ex husband!!!! Changed, or not, which my guess is NOT!

I got my entertainment weekly, muh ah ah ah ah!!!!! This is the subscription I stole from those we dont speak of. Sadly, the week prior was a Star Wars cover, and that wouldve really made him mad if he didnt get it. Oh well, Its mine now! I sat down with Tivo to record all my favorite upcoming shows for the summer!

Did I mention it was hotter than hell this wknd? My first months electric bill was 88 bucks. I don't have gas, just electric. But, lets remember, I am home from 10pm and go to bed at 12am. Sleep, get up at 7am and leave by 7:30 am. Thats all I'm home!!! Doing the math...ummmm roughly 12.5 hours not including wknds that I am home a week using electric!
I leave no lights on. So, how on earth is my bill that high? You got me! I dont have a/c. I can't afford to turn it on!!!! And that was BEFORE a washer and dryer came!!!! I called to complain but they told me i used that much electric! Cant wait to see this months, with laundry, and fans going!! It just amazes me how bad you get screwed in this world!!!!!!

Today's Question:

If you were to be the opposite sex for one day what would you do?

I would most definatley have sex. Lots of it!! You know, you are guaranteed to get off, because thats the luck of being a man!! LOL! Then I would take my car to get all the work done it that it would possibly need, because I wouldn't get screwed because I'm a woman. And, then I would like to act like the men I know, and lay around watching TV, drinking beer, watching women take care of me, and doing nothing!! Sounds like the good life!


JustDes said...

LOL...you would have lots of sex....hmmm....I don't know why i'm laughing, i probably would too!

Man, I know that stage you're talking about...i just passed that stage last week....hopefully by the months end i'll be at the I dont need you anyway stage....*sigh*....love sucks!

Mon said...

Love stinks....yea yea... love stinks love stinks....