"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort










Monday, October 30, 2006

When I grow Up....

Monday already? At least the sun was shining when I woke up. The time change is rough the first few days. For sure! Saturday night the party was off for us, since it was close to 20 degrees. Gotta love that. Me and Kat went to the party at our usual hang out, the Bier Haus. Bubba stood us up. But I can guarantee you in a week she will say how we should get together and hang out, cus we NEVER do anything. She always plans events, and bails. Tough shit for her. Me and Kat are always kickin' it. I had 4 glasses of wine before hitting the bar. I rock.

Kat dressed up as some sexified evil angel. I love seeing everyones costumes, Nicole Ritchie was the most entertaining, as you might expect. She was super drunk, and kept showing everyone her black underwear, booty dancing with her friend, and dropping drink glasses on the dance floor. Some guy was lifting her skirt with his foot and we stopped him. Fucking pervert!

Some good costumes were super sperm, condom dispenser (with real dispensible condoms), deviled egg, and the mexicans from the restaurant next door, that dressed up as uh, mexicans. They were sloshed, and, they even did the mexican hat dance on the dance floor. I'm not sure if it was official, but it was entertaining. There was this one chick dressed as a cop, and her boyfriend was an inmate. Um, the cop lady was un-naturally perfectly shaped. We hated her. We decided that she was a miserable girl who never ate. But seriously, I dunno where the hell she came from, but you don't see much of girls like that round these parts.

Naturally after drinking, Kat and me like to cut loose on the dance floor. Some boys danced with us but we felt dumb. I really don't want to be someone who has to pick dudes up in a bar, ok? Please, someone wanna marry me already? Then the DJ danced with us, cus my mean brother wouldn't. Nothing like slow dancing with your best friend. Everyone is so jealous of us. We had a lot of drinks and a lot of laughs, and a lot of frickin' pizza rolls when we got home.

Hey, did I tell you that I found my first gray hair yet? Yes? Oh, Ok. Then, I found #2 this morning. It was probably there at the same time as #1 but, maybe it was glued to my head or something. I might have gray hair, but I was still kickin' it at the bar, with the extra hour, even after the ugly lights came on! I'm mostly depressed about the hair thing, cus I wanted to be that old lady with the belly shirt, and fuck me boots dancing at the clubs. This gray hair totally killed my dreams. Of course, I'm kidding. She was instructed to never let me do that.

Another thing I'm forbidden from doing? Wearing cat shirts. Shirts about cats, with cat pictures, cat asses, paw prints, I don't care. I love cats, but wearing cat shirts just screams crazy cat lady. I also do not want to wear those themed tops. Sweaters especially. No snowflakes, snowmen, pumpkins, hearts, nothing. You know, like the sweaters I saw in the women's department at Kohl's where I had to shop for my shirt the day I found my gray hair. I'll hunt you down when I'm dead and reviewing my life, if you let me wear that shit. Seriously!

6 comments:

supplymadam said...

Sounds like you guys had a really great time. Fantastico!
I hate themed shirts too although last year I got this tasteful green long sleeve knit shirt with a snowman on it at an upscale store that was going out of business so for 10.00 I figured I could deal with the snowman. Because he was placed strategically on the shirt.

Jess said...

My wife is a veterinarian, and she has given me explicit instructions to intervene if I ever catch her delving into the world of animal-themed clothing. ;)

Hothousemomma said...

Its okay to be dancing in the bar. Not okay to be at home hating be single :-)
As long as you arent wearing sweater vests with reindeers, you cool!

EC said...

Sounds like a fabulous night!!!!

Well, personally, I'm against any animal shirts/hats/purses/pajamas, lol... I just can't do it myself, but to each his own!

Mon said...

Supplymadam:
I think there is tasteful, and there is cheesy. But with animals ehhhhh dunno.

Jess:
Oh yea, that's easy to fall into being a veterinerian, and you could explain it away too. Awesome profession tho! I'm jealous!

HHmomma:
True, once you starts staying home, you're sucked into the category of spinster.

Erin:
I should have specified what animals. I do have a lot of Hello Kitty stuff. But...she's a fashion icon. She doesn't count!

Jay said...

THere's a store here called Northern Reflections that's exactly for the crazy cat lady market - but it is diverse, becuase it also features sweatshirts and cardigans with such exciting things as: loons, ducks, docks, oh yeah, all kinds of great stuff.