"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Ms. Brightside....

Spring has Sprung! It rained a torential downpour, and what do I get? A stank downstairs. It smelled so musty and gross, I had to stay up Tuesday night cleaning the downstairs carpets, and putting two fans on them, and the de-humidifier. When I get my next place, It won't be in the middle of a river. I got enough problems with pets, let alone water stank!

Speaking of flowers, I had to order flowers for one of my VP's wives this week. I guess I thought that stuff only happened in the movies. And, I know he had nothing else going on for hours when he asked me to do it. I don't mind, Bubba's mom works at the florist, so it was a fun call for me to make.What'd she get? 21 red roses, for 21 years of marriage. Sent by the secretary. Ha! It cost $125. For flowers. *Sigh*

When I meet the man of my dreams, he wont think twice about doing things like that. Or, having his secretary do it. It's the thought that counts! At least he picked out what he wanted, right? And, can you imagine how wonderful 21 roses would smell? *sigh* I'll buy my own fucking roses. Better yet, I'll buy my own sunflowers. Their way cuter, and smell delish!

Speaking of work. Everything that comes to work, is opened in the mail room. No trading of business secrets, or shipping merchandise in our out of here. So, when I get my VP's mail it's already opened. I open it, and file it in folders. Anyhoo, someone I work for got a card from one of the field employees, saying that their hot and cant wait to see them in May. Nice huh? Men are all the same.

So, you remember how I said CP stopped calling me? Apparently, that's cus he was in the hoosgow. The slammer. The pen. Behind bars. Locked up. Nice, huh? Felony. A felony. I mean seriously, laugh if you want about me and all my thought changing practices with "The Secret", but I have been asking for a sign on what to do with the whole relationship thing.

I just Don't know about that boy. He said it's from back in November, which it very well could be. I've always been like a magnet for this sort of thing. I'm turning it off. No more addicts. I can't handle it anymore, it sucks your freaking energy, and makes you forget about yourself. It's too easy to blame them for everything, and forget that you have your own problems. I'm trying so hard to get myself put back together. I'm done giving myself away. Being told that I wasn't 'there for' someone, when clearly, I was the only one there. He was too busy worrying about his next fix to see it. I deserve more.

He is the one who made the choices that got him where he is. Not me. He was too busy breaking the law, while I moved on with someone else, and I am the one who is blamed for moving on. Forget that he broke the law. And lied to me. For ummmm....the ZILLIONTH time. And disappeared for two weeks. I'm the bad person for what I did. I'm done thinking that myself, and I'll be damned if I let someone else try to make me feel bad for my choices. I made them. It's my life. That's all I really wanna say about it.

Like a ray of sunshine I got a call from a girl at the po-po station, wondering if I wanted to give up any shifts. She's off next weekend, maybe she doesn't realize it's Easter? Whatever, sorry about your luck! So, now instead of working every wknd, I work every OTHER weekend. Which rocks. Yay me!

Kat got a new car that she is picking up today. She got a Mazda Miata 5 hardtop convertible. Have I ever mentioned how she sucks with her trips to Italy and Amsterdam, and her brand spanking new car? I can't be jealous, cus there is enough
for everyone. Jealousy comes from the thought that there is not enough good fortune to go around. See, one day, I'm going to have everything I want too. So, I can't hate her for it. Bitch.

Is there anything better than Cheez-its? I think not. Except maybe a Reese's Peanut Butter Egg. But they are completely two separate things. So they can both be awesome in their own way.

Did you watch Lost? OMG. Loved it.

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