"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Monday, June 14, 2010

Burns and Burrrrrns...

Friday I went tanning as is the norm. I felt a burning under my boobs, and when I reached under them, found a foreign substance that was psychodelic green. (from the tanning lights) I rolled over the side of the bed to investigate what I'd just pulled out of my boobs, and it was a banana pepper.

From my five dollar footlong. Boobs are good for pretty much one thing. Catching food and drink.

Turns out, you shouldnt go tanning with banana peppers stuck to your boobs, because it produces painful welts. Yea, I got em. They are raw, and hurt.

My girlfriend ran into the ex husband this weekend. He told her he still thinks about me and about how he messed up.

Certainly must suck to harbor all that guilt for 11 years. You would think it would make me feel good, in a way it does. It helps fuel the "its not you its me" theme that runs through my relationships.

Have I mentioned what a super duper skank he married? Cus he totally downgraded, not only is she skanky, shes an ugly person. I am so freaking sweet I can hardly stand myself!

  • I drank a bottle of captain morgans this weekend and never got a buzz. I think this might signify I drink too much.

  • Had a yardsale with my mom. I made 10 bucks. Seven of it was from one of my girlfriends. I made like 10 cents an hour to bake in the sun.


Teena in Toronto said...

Thanks for the tanning advice. Who knew?! Ha!

I love sailing with the Captain!

Alaskan Dave Down Under said...

Rosehip oil and aloe vera juice (pure stuff) will take care of the burn. No peeling or blistering either.

You know, this post REALLY needed a picture!

Carolyn G said...

Okay a banana pepper under the boob? ROFL I better start checking under mine!

heather said...

I've had some odd things end up in my bra but I can honestly say I've never had a banana pepper there!

I haven't been here for a while, love the new theme!

And I seriously hate when that happens with alcohol!