"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Moving Forward....

A lot has happened in the past few months. Some sad, some happy, but all of it was meant to happen. I spend a lot of time reflecting on the changes in my life, and how they got me to where I am.

A year ago, me and manfriend were happy and dating, and...going nowhere. He was happy being on his own, and couldn't tell me when we would ever move forward, yet he would tell me he saw himself moving forward with me.

Its now been 2 years and 7 months and we've had a lot of ups, and one big down. The down broke my heart and shattered my world. But until that happened, manfriend was still unsure about us, and our future. He was scared to take any steps to better our situation. We broke up, and I moved to be closer to him (and work, but mostly him) and he still broke up with me.

The move turned into a big positive for me. A beautiful apartment, and new beginnings. I got rid of a lot of baggage both emotionally, and physically that I'd been carting around for years. The whole time I knew I was meant to be with manfriend. The reason it hurt so much and was so confusing is just that...I saw what should be. I wasn't holding on to the usual false dreams either.

So, now, four months after getting back together, we are finally doing it. We're moving forward. Taking the plunge. We're moving in together!!!!!!! (pause for cheers.....)

He told me he is tired of stubbornly sitting in the waiting room and watching others who came in after him, go in before him. I told him "I know, I've been sitting beside your stubborn ass"

He's making the big trek to the little city to live with me. I always pictured it as our apartment. And I can't wait to start making it home with him. No more leaving, and saying goodbye. I think its time we start seeing how we are to live with on a day to day basis. I can't wait to go to sleep with him every night, and wake up with him every morning. Starting our own traditions.

And most importantly...saving for a house. I havn't lived with someone in about 5 or 6 years. I had a dickhole living with me, or should I say sponging off me 4 years ago for a couple years, but it's been so long since I had someone who actually contributed to a household. Financially or emotionally. I am beyond excited. I have visualized this (see it....be it) for so long.

I always wondered when we would start our forever. The answer is, the end of May. *squee!*


Sister Copinherhair said...

Oh my God!!! SO HAPPY!!!

Rachel said...

Good for you! I'm new to your blog! So wanted to say hello :)

mylittlebecky said...

*relationship five!* how exciting :)

Teena in Toronto said...

I hope it works out for you.