Curiosity Killed The Cat(s)....

Is it just my cats, or does everyone else have this problem?

Your sitting on the toilet, minding your own business, and the cat's push open the door and circle your legs. If this goes unnoticed, they flop over and insist that I rub their bellies. If that goes unnoticed, they jump on the tub, and crawl between the shower curtain and liner, where they make their way to my lap and knead their paws vigorously on my naked legs.

Think it's cute? My cat's are not declawed. Imagine.

I scream, push them off, and the whole thing starts again, and by that time, there is another cat or two in the mix.

I don't make a point to follow them to their shitter, why do they feel the need to investigate me? Is it because I'm crapping in their watering hole? Do they think the bathroom is the gateway to a new, mysterious world? Will I go in there, and never, ever come back again? Am I hiding the whisker lickin's in there? Do I harvest the cat nip while behind closed doors? Do I have a secret cat stashed away that I might give 2 seconds of attention to while I'm doing my business? What?

If I decide I want more privacy and push the door all the way closed, they scratch the outside of it, and cry.... as if I am tearing their hearts out with a spoon!!

Add this as reason #457,895,127 why I don't want kids. I get enough harassment with 4 cats.

Rested and Relaxed...

Well, hallelujah it's FRIDAY! Know how fast a work week goes, when you don't have to work 2 jobs? Pretty damn fast! I'm lovin' it!! I went home last night and said "what can I do?" rather than..."I have to do this, this, that, this and this in 2 hours". And, I got a lot done! Nice workout, some housework. Some TV. Fucking TiVo didn't record American Idol. I think it's overloaded and we were um, BUSY when it came on. Oh well it was worth missing. 2 days in a row, is a record we havn't seen in a few months! And, if I have to work tonight, I'll be ok. It's been a much needed vacation from that hell hole called the second job!

CP picked up a bunch of crap from the Library. Guess what he got me? You'll never guess, so I'll tell you, FRAGGLE ROCK!!! I squealed with excitement!! The FRAGGLES! I don't remember that much singing in it when I was younger. But awesome nonetheless. The gorgs, the trash heap, the doozers. It made me LOL. Remember the way muppets would dance? I chased my cares away, down at Fraggle Rock! Sure beat typing until my hand went numb all night!

The man came to bed at 2am again. Then he read! I said wtf are you doing? "Trying to fall asleep" He was up playing that gay game. I don't understand boys and their toys. How can a game take over your life like that? I mean, I've been sucked into games. Mainly, the Crash Bandicoot series, and The Sims. But, since it was ME, it was cool.

This wknd Bubba and her fiance are coming over to catch up on Grey's Anatomy. I've got 6 weeks of that show saved on Tivo. Plus, 2 Desperate Housewives. 8 hours sucking up her hard drive. Not to mention the 3 wks of Lost I have to always have on-hand. Cus, you gotta go back and re-watch that shit!!! She aint been right for a while, running slow and what-not. I blame it on the suckage of space. Bubba's gonna flip when she see's all that she has missed on Grey! I'm the best friend ever. I don't loan out TiVo space that often!

I went to the bank yesterday and I had an insane amount in the bank. I just got paid and paid my entire pay out, so I was confused. They fucked up. Big shocker. I should sue them for something. Getting my hopes up? Did I win the lottery? NO! Assholes.

I have PMS and I feel like a freaking lard today. Even my hair feels fat. Being a woman can suck balls sometimes. However, I did make the best shake in the universe for breakfast! Milk, Ice, Frozen strawberries, and strawberry slim fast. It was just like a McDonalds shake. Only, not as creamy. But just as yummy!!

**Update. Tayray informed me onsmoke break, that she 'heard' us doin' the deed last night. Our bedrooms are neighbors too. I said no you didn't!!!! She said she was doing the same thing. We had a good laugh, and out walks a much older co-worker from behind the dumpster who was also smoking. She said "more power to ya"....classic.

Today's Question is random from the book:

What are the best and worst letters you have received in the mail?

Letters in the mail? Oh, yes, I use to get snail mail! The best? Probably when my boyfriend Chris would write me from the army. I got a letter every day, and it always made me smile. The worst? Every fucking time I get DENIED credit for some BULLSHIT reason!

I'm With The Band...

How to have a fabulous Day. Get called off by a supervisor from your second job! (AWESOME!) Go for a walk with your neighbor, lift some weights. Don't eat anything bad all day. Pre-order your Edwin CD. Get lucky. Come to work the next day, sing Edwin loudly in the car on the way, wave to strangers, and find a friend request from none other than Edwin McCain himself! Yea, we're friends now on myspace. And, say what you want I'm sure he checks his account, cus he's awesome like that! Plus, we already met. Sheesh. Of course we're buddies!

I have felt hung over for a couple of days. I wonder wtf that is all about? I havn't drank since last Saturday, when I had a whopping 2 beers. And then I had a glass of wine Monday. And 2 beers last night. But thats not DRINKING drinking. It's 'having a drink' big difference. My brain is probably sprouting a tumor. No biggie.

I've been doing stupid things when I am alone. At work. Calf raises. 1 legged squats. Crap like that. Mostly I do it at job 2 so I'd just seem like one of the retarded people if someone saw me. I might not have to work ALL WEEK at the second job. Sure, the pay will suck, but it's a small price to pay for happiness! And I'm in a great mood today!

TV addict moment: Has anyone seen the previews for that new show...Unanimous? Nothing screams made for ME like a good freaking reality show about people who want to kill each other!!!! IMAGINE what is going to happen!!!! I love it!!!



I leave you with this pcycho fan moment. Edwin's new album drops April 11. I pre-ordered mine, have YOU? I see him in 2 months and 4 days....I realize that no one really cares but me, but I just might never come back again, YOU DON'T KNOW! I could be spotted in the audience by some record label person who enjoys my vocal stylings. Be on the road singin' back up for the band. Be like Penny Lane and become a band aid! (and we all remember what kind of band aid SHE was, right? wink wink nod nod)

Ok, now, I have to finish up my second addiction, my LOST post. God it was freaking awesome!!

Today's Question:

What do you do when you think you are alone, that you'd be embaressed if someone caught you doing?

Ring Ding Dong....

Doncha just love that Ice Cube and Dr Dre song? Keep they heads ringin'? Ring ding dong, dinga ding ding ding dong. Ok, enough.

DING DONGS. There are very few things in this world that I simply CANNOT resist. (although at the time of this post, it will have been 24 hours I have resisted) Ding Dongs happen to be one of them. I remember when Ding Dongs came in a box. Do they still? Are they still individually wrapped in foil? I have so long since given them up, that I don't even know.

They are in the vending machine at work. Right next to a Double Decker Oatmeal cream pie. Why anyone needs that, is beyond me. I went to get my semi-healthy mid-morning snack of peanut butter crackers. Good thing I am wise to the vending ways, and know that not much can hurt you for 50 cents. If you only take 50 cents, you can't get the evil Ding Dongs, or Oatmeal cream pies, or Pop Tarts. Just the crackers. Or, I guess, the candy bars, but they don't really tempt me.

And, because I was actually thinking about indulging, I looked up the nutritional facts. This will stop anyone from eating the fuckers! That is in 1 Ding Dong. They are smaller than a cupcake! I can have a whole bowl of sugar free ice cream, and still not get to that calorie count! Evil! Pure Evil!

Yesterday was pay everyone else day! It's a new moon! Time for spells and mischief! Just kidding! But I'm cleansing the house tonight. Never hurts! My friend K from job #2 called me and told me we didnt have to work last night!!!! I called my supervisor and it was TRUE! I had a night off! 4 extra glorious hours at home! I put laundry away, mopped the bathroom, put dishes away, swept, dusted, lifted weights! AND watched plenty of TV! This having a life shit is just what I needed yesterday. I had the shittiest outlook on life!

Hey!! Have you ever found money in your purse or pocket that you forgot about? Me either, I think that is for people who don't pay out down to their last dollar in their bank account. *sigh*


Today's Question:

What is your irresistable every day snack food?
It would have to be Combos!!! Or those flavored pretzel bits from Snyder. The ranch ones, or honey mustard!

Slum Lord...

Let me start by saying, that I do not live in the slums, nor does my landlord deserve the title of 'lord' in any sense of the word.

It snowed last night. About 4 or 5 inches. It was a matter of probably 4-5 hours that this happened over. I get a call at job #2 from Tayray, warning me not to attempt to get into our driveway, cus the stupid bitch landlord didn't have the drive cleared. We live on quite a steep hill. Let's think back to Dec. 8 when I couldn't get up in my car, and my back wheel landed in the ditch, and CP and Tayray's BF had to push me out. Luckily. Another time, I went down the hill sideways thinking my life was going to end, as I crashed into someones front room. Last night, Tayray had the same problem, she went down sideways.

I called CP to see when he'd be home to help Tayray get up the hill. She ended up parking across the street at a friends house. He called me shortly after, to tell me that our neighbors girlfriend fell into the ditch I slid into, only, her entire car was in it. They tried to get it out, but in the end a tow truck had to come. Tayray called to complain last night to our skanklord. Hopefully more neighbors did. I called but she didn't answer and I wanted to talk to her.

So, I take the 25 minute drive home from job #2, and turn it into a 50 minute drive. Which is always fucking fun to do after working 14 God Damn hours! I had to go 25 the whole entire way, cus no matter which way I go, I have to contend with hills. I wouldn't want to have another near death experience. The roads were awful. All they said on the radio was 'where are the snow plows' good fucking question. This is maybe the second real snow storm we had. Um, where are the salt trucks? I am really depressed about the state of the world these days. We can't even clear the fucking roads? Since when??? We normally dig out every morning here in the winter, and it's never been this much of a problem!

CP said he would get my car up THE HILL, he got his car up. I didn't want to contend with the hill this morning, knowing what a dumb fucking bitch landlord I have, I knew it wouldn't be cleared.

So, I parked about a block away, at a church. Hoped I didn't get towed, because my landlord is a stupid fucking worthless peice of shit. Did I mention that? Hoped I didn't have a break in, cus I clearly state on my car insurance that the fucking car is in the fucking garage overnight. So, this morning instead of getting into a clean, dry, warm car in the garage-- I had to put on CP's boots, and tredge through the snow down a hill on FOOT, to my frozen car. Tug and tug on the door to get it opened.....ice. Wait for it to defrost and warm up, and drive to work. and arrive 20 minutes late, to start my whole work-filled day again today! I just love it.

On the way I placed a call to the landlord, who, didn't answer:

"Hi MICHELLE (yea, thats her real name)this is Mon I'm calling from 'my street' where I just tredged down that treacherous hill in the snow to my car, because I couldn't park in the driveway. I wondered if you were going to do anything about it. I know that last night myself and several of my neighbors could not get up or down, and here it is, the next morning AFTER the snow, and you still havn't had it cleared. I just wondered if you planned on doing anything about it, thanksssssssssss"

How fucking hard is it to pay some dillhole a hundred bucks a year, and have them clear some motherfucking driveways? Huh? I of course, read my lease which states that she isn't responsible for damage due to rain, wind or snow. Nevermind the fact that at LEAST 3 of us (there is only 4 apartments) asked shithead if she kept the snow clear in the winter, to which she responded YES. I pay a LOT of money to live there. We also all pay different rents for the SAME apartment!!! I'm going to report her to the BBB, or something, and ruin her stupid pathetic life! I work too fucking hard to have to deal with this bullshit!

MY FUCKING FEET ARE STILL FROZEN!



Today's Question:

What's your slumbitch story?

Monday Bloody Monday...

Is that song Monday bloody Monday, or Sunday bloody Sunday? I should ask my sister, she is the master of 'howsaresgo'. Har-D-Har.

I slept away the wknd. I'm so freaking tired today it isn't funny! I was however, awake enough to get my Edwin tickets in the mail!!!! Not well enough though, for proper celebration. I'll get to it!

I thought I'd be ok to go out for Bubba's bday celebration, but CP had to call me off. My throat hurt so bad and I slept. You'd think I was rarin' to go today but I'm not. I wasted 2 days. I got no cleaning done, except for the dishes and the rabbit condo So, all week I'll be trying to squeeze cleaning in. I got pets. It can't go til next weekend!

I got a visit from Katie and her son. She said they were in Amish country on their way home, and he needed to use the potty. I'm a good half way point. Turned out, he didn't have to go, he just wanted to visit Aunt Mon's petting zoo. That's what Aunties are for.

CP made me chicken soup. He really made it, with chicken and real vegetables, and noodles. It was the muthafuckingbomb!! I think this was the first time being sick in YEARS that I didn't cry for my Momma. Someone actually took care of me! Even brought me Sunkist!

While we're on the subject, CP joined this stupid online game for final fantasy that he had been itching to do. After of course, I got the speech on how it won't take away from our time together, and he'll never do it when I'm home. Let me note here, that I normally wouldn't care, but I'm only home 2 hrs a night other than sleep...remember? So, he said to me at 12:15 after playing the game, "i'll be right in to bed" I woke up at 2:30 and there he sat, playing that game on a work night, Mr. "I can't stay up past midnight any other day". Like a freaking kid! His own brother told me not to let him do it cus it'll suck his will to live. He said CP spent real, live, human reality money, for fake, unusable, video game world money. Boys are so gay!!!!!!!!!!!! Hey, wait, my friend Kat is sucked into her own game world! Dare I say, gamers are gay??

Today's Question:
What can suck you in and make you lose track of time?

I dunno that anything does these days, I'm always aware of time; and how I spend it. I think I might need something mindless to do, to loosen me up! Wait, DRINKING! When I drink I don't care about the time! I need to get drunk I think! That's it!

Sometimes Work Ethics Suck...

I had a shitty Friday. I should add to my resume 'miracle worker' cus I'm getting pretty damn good at it! We are using a new web-based newsletter thing at work for the newsletter I used to code by hand. Supposedly 'easier'. Sure it is, to someone who doesn't know html. I am use to coding and having no limits. This program, limits what you can do and it is frustrating to know how to do something, and not being able to do it.

I got to job 2 and there was a note saying we could go home with no incident if we wanted. FUCK YEA! I went to tell the supervisor and he said "oh, that shouldn't be up there, we need help, we're screwed we're 2 days behind" I said then you should take that note down before people get their hopes up. He said "you can go since you saw it, but I'd realllllly appreciate it if you'd stay" BTW we were not 2 days behind.

WTF would you do? I fucking stayed. I never even got a fucking THANK YOU! It turned out to be good cus I was pissed off and I made 50 bucks in 4 hours. Now we're talkin!

When I got home CP had gone and got me 2 of my favorite things. Beer, and wine! He's the sweetest!

Then, Chelsea bear cuddled with me on my lap, and made me smile. I got these adorable pictures. CP said she looks dead. But I assure you, she was cuddling in my lap and she just goes hypno and zones out when you rub her belly. She's only the cutest bunny EVER. So enjoy!

How To Feel Like A Peice Of Shit In One Easy Click....

I love to help people, and helping you feel like crap, is even better. I got on the Biggest Loser website to try to join the biggest loser club, only it costs money. But, know what is free? You can act like you are siging up for a free diet (which you never get btw) and find out your BMI (body mass index) there. Which, I have known mine for a while, and it shall remain secret, but this has a chart. It puts your BMI on a scale from one extreme to the next. Under, Healthy, Over, OBESE!

I'm thinking I'm hot shit, cus you know, I lost 28 lbs and I'm still struggling desperatly to hold on to that, and lose more, but that's a lot and I'm proud of it. So, where do I fall on such a scale you ask?

OBESE!

I can shop at a regular store! When I think Obese, I'm thinking, moo moo's and house slippers!
So, if you want to feel like a fat lard, I encourage you to log on to the biggest loser site, and find out where you fall. The worst part of it, is it tells you you are obese, then asks you to pay for a freaking diet plan, as if that will work. More reasons people ARE obese! DIETS! Kiss my obese ass!!!!! They also have my 'Ideal weight' at 107. I was really sickly in high school cus I never ate. I also, never weighed 107. So, that's totally wrong!!

Why not just say your fucking fat and get over it! Words are some funny things aren't they? Cus, I'm totally ok with the fact that I'm overweight. I don't like it, and I'm working on changing it, but I can accept the terminology. Just like sometimes I am a bitch, but I wouldn't like to be called one. Ya hurr?

Don't get me wrong, I love the show, and it is really inspiring, and I've learned a few things from it. If you check out the sample workout routines, you will see why those people lose weight so fast. They work out 3 hours a day, 6 days a week.

To sum it up: The biggest loser club will make you feel like a loser!!!!

Today's Question:

What do you think about all the hoop-la over words? They are, just words! But they can hurt!

Give Credit, Where Credit Is Due.....

I recently went with Progressive auto insurance. You know, they'll tell you their rates, plus the rates of several other customers...yadda yadda. I was always particular with my car insurance, because I wouldn't go to places that ran your credit. I think it's wrong. I got a pretty good deal with one of their 'other customers' and was excited to have this taken directly from my account so I don't have to fool with it whatsoever. They never said they would run my credit, I thought there was some kind of disclosure law about that, but what do I know? I'm a marketing assistant. Apparently I can't read.

I will say, they were fast. My policy started right away and within 3 days I had my permanent insurance card and all my info in the mail. I didn't even have to talk to a person at all. I did it all online. But, within all my paperwork, was a statement as to why I didn't get the lowest rate possible.

My credit.

They also listed the 'reasons' my credit is 'bad'. Apparently, it is a horrible thing, to have 1 credit inquiry in 24 months. I'm really fucking careful with this shit, OBVIOUSLY! I don't try for things that run my credit, as I am trying to get my score higher so I can get a mortgage in a couple years. 1 inqury in 2 years, is pretty fucking good if you ask me! Another reason? I paid my car payment late past 30 days 1 time in the last 2 years. Not good, but I had to up and move out with no warning, so that kinda happens. What else....oh, the kicker. I have 40% of my credit cards in use. Not even HALF the balance on the whopping 2 credit cards I have. Which I pay, above the damn minimum, ON TIME every month! Nevermind that only half my income is spent out in bills! Fuck that useless information!

I dunno much about other places, but here in Ohio we are required to carry fucking car insurance. They send us letters randomly in the mail from the BMV asking for proof. We have to sign a waiver when we get our tags. It's asked for when you are pulled over for anything. So, how is it ok to go by CREDIT on something you are REQUIRED to carry? And, what does my credit have to do with the ability to pay, when it is coming right out of my account? If I don't have money in there, they'll still get paid, and I'll be screwed with overdrafts. I mean, I really don't get it!

It is like they were dead set against giving me 'the lowest rate' so they had to come up with some half assed retarded excuse to fuck me over. ASSHOLES! When my 6 months is up with them, I'm SO out of there!!!!

You have to pay your car payment, insurance, tags, and liscense plates, your drivers liscense, and now, I personally pay 120 a month for gas to drive the damn thing. I think what I really need is homeowners insurance on the sumbitch!

This is for Momma: I walked last night. It was cold. Hill had her comfy sweater, I had my warm coat, and guess what I wish I had half way through my walk? Cotton Balls for my ears. I'm getting old. My ears never use to hurt in the cold!!!!

Today's Question:

Do YOU think it's right they check a credit score to insure a car?