Admitting Defeat...

Eventually, you gotta admit when you've been defeated. Like today. I'm sick. Unable to talk. Not being able to talk makes me angry. So does typing on my computer at home cus my space bar barely works. grrr.

Possible good news for me..my friend who's been trying to get me into the university called me to say they will be hiring in her husbands department. Wish me luck! Better news? My Momma bought a house yesterday. Here. In Ohio!! Her and my sister are nervous about it (sister is staying in VA) I am at peace having her here. It feels nice for once! My brother will have a place to stay that isn't a shithole. I dont have to worry about him. It would seem things may be looking up for me. Now, it's time to get that new job, and quit the second one.

Last night at the second job I almost biffed it cus I straight fell asleep while working. I have dozed off plenty and woke up when I started to drift, but last night was deeper and I woke up suddenly, and almost fell out of my chair, and caused a ruckus and everyone saw me. It was the funniest thing, but also quite sad. Why is it again that I'm killing myself working?

Oh yes, because I learned long ago, that the only person you can depend on is yourself. And, no one is going to be rescuing me. When I finally do land a good job and I can quit, I know one thing, I'm never working two jobs again. I've spent the last 3 1/2 years doing it. It's so hard to make it on your own. But I also like being on my own, so I shouldn't complain. I do get pissed off when I get shutoffs for electric, or tax bills, when there are people who sit on their asses and live off the government, when they are able to work. I despise laziness. I have a right to.

And, so...LOST?? Hello writer's strike? Get over yourselves. If you make me wait another 6 months for Lost episodes (only 6 new ones left!!!!!) you're going down. What....the fuck? I think I could watch this one 15 times and never get it. Did you notice the guy last week who visited Hurly in the psych ward, when he left he turned into black mist? His name is Abbaddon, which is in the bible as a reference to the devil or keeper of lost souls, according to Wikipedia. Is his "team" in on the lost souls collection? If the losties are dead, how the hell do they get off the island in flash forwards? I wonder if the pilot who flew the copter to the island was that old when the plane crashed?

How is the pilot in the ocean? He was ripped to shreds in season one by 'the monster' and plopped in a tree? Last week Hurley saw Jack's dad in the cabin in the chair like Jacob. It really was Jacks dad! This new pilot with the copter...looked to me to be Jacob. Huh? Thoughts? What about that dude that is a ghost buster? Obviously there is a reason he is on the team. Did it appear to anyone else when these people arrived on the island last night, they did it thru a sort of worm hole? How'd that cow with the big nads get there? Like the horse?

How did Ben have his picture taken, and piss people off that aren't on the island, when he's spent his whole life there? Is he a sort of "legend"? Maybe he is an apparition in the photo? The ghostbuster guy could've gotten his picture w/his weird ghostbusty vaccume thing? Where was that team digging that found the polar bear...in the desert? Until I am well enough to surf the net to find all the easter eggs..I'm baffled. I Love a show that makes me think. To see who won Lost-vivor go to Apropos of Something.