I have been, as my friend Katie said on her like, 5th phone message that I have yet to be able to return...."earning my raise". It's been a hectic week as it is, with all of our district managers in for meetings, on top of that, down two secretaries, and managing the remaining two, one of whom is brand new. I havn't taken a lunch all week either. I don't have to anymore. I always hated being required to clock in and out.
On top of making way more money, I also get an even better jewelry discount ( I am not letting this temptation get to me, I'm done buying things til I'm out of debt!) and a bonus. Bonus? Fuck yea, I said bonus!
I also had my review, where I "exceeded expectations" and got an excellent score. I don't have to count my sick time anymore, so when I'm sick I can be off work and be paid and not worry about it. I am also eligible for this award that you can be nominated for, where the prize...is um...that you get to go on the annual INCENTIVE TRIP which last year was a freaking cruise to the bahamas. It's my mission, to kick ass in my new position, hold my team together, and amaze everyone that we can take on more work. I'll send you a post card from whatever sunny location I happen to land on.
Am I complaining? No, I thrive on it. Suprisingly, after announcing that my promotion is permanent, I havn't gotten any crap as expected. Everyone is happy for me. Hey, I am one hell of a girl, what can I say? Power hasn't changed me, and it never will. That's not my style. The people I thought would be a problem for me, have been super nice. Let's hope it keeps up. Friday, I am sitting in on interviews for a new secretary. Having another new person will make me want to pull out my hair, but I can handle it. And I know they will be trained the right way, which of course is my way.
Oh, and ummmm. I TURNED IN MY NOTICE AT THE SECOND JOB!!!!!!!!!!!! *pause while the angels sing* I only gave a week and a day cus I don't have a job only I do and they'll live without me. They were sad to see me go, but I can't say the same about leaving.
In cute news, my boyfriend came to visit me Monday night, in a snowstorm, and wound up sideways in my ditch. I felt so bad. He's only the most adorable guy in the world. Even cuter? Was the fact that when he went to get bacon on Sunday for our breakfast, he got a jar of gravy. I asked if it was for his eggs, and he said it's for my dog. See why I love him? Well, it's only one of the bazillion reasons.
Mom update. She's still in the hospital, and will likely go home with oxygen. She is doing good though. She will close her house next week, and we'll be busy trying to get her furniture, work two jobs, and have a life. Phew! Yea, once I get my insurance, I'm trying Chantex....time to quit smoking before I wind up in the same boat. I just wish I didn't like it so damn much!
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Me...Speechless?...
I missed work yesterday, because I was up all night taking my mom to the hospital on Sunday. She is going to be fine, but she scared the shit out of me, that's for sure. She couldn't breathe. She's in there a couple of days til she gets better.
When I told my boss about why I wouldn't be in she told me she was sorry of course, not to worry, and that she had amazing news for me when I got back to work. Stress on the amazing, she said I would be very pleased. I knew it was about my raise.
Today, I was blown away. I had no idea it would be as much as it is. I never thought, I would make what I am making. And I mean...never. K? It's $16 grand more a year than I make now. It's a little over $7/hour more than I'm making. Huh? Guess who is turning in her notice at her second job? Guess who was brought to tears and profusely thanked her boss?
My boss will also still be my boss when she is back from leave. That was a shock, but a happy one! She's moving departments, but things are changing she said. They are announcing to the department now, that my promotion is permanent, as it was on Friday, it was going to be temporary. Hope it all goes over well. I am so shocked. Shocked. The VP's keep congratulting me and saying how much I deserve it. I am just doing my job. It's amazing to actually think...I'm not going to struggle? What? I can't grasp it yet. I just want to run screaming into the streets. Except it snowed a lot and I might fall on my ass, so that's a bad idea.
When I told my boss about why I wouldn't be in she told me she was sorry of course, not to worry, and that she had amazing news for me when I got back to work. Stress on the amazing, she said I would be very pleased. I knew it was about my raise.
Today, I was blown away. I had no idea it would be as much as it is. I never thought, I would make what I am making. And I mean...never. K? It's $16 grand more a year than I make now. It's a little over $7/hour more than I'm making. Huh? Guess who is turning in her notice at her second job? Guess who was brought to tears and profusely thanked her boss?
My boss will also still be my boss when she is back from leave. That was a shock, but a happy one! She's moving departments, but things are changing she said. They are announcing to the department now, that my promotion is permanent, as it was on Friday, it was going to be temporary. Hope it all goes over well. I am so shocked. Shocked. The VP's keep congratulting me and saying how much I deserve it. I am just doing my job. It's amazing to actually think...I'm not going to struggle? What? I can't grasp it yet. I just want to run screaming into the streets. Except it snowed a lot and I might fall on my ass, so that's a bad idea.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
giveth and taketh away...
Friday it was official, I got the supervisor position at work. I also was approved for a raise, still don't know the amount but my boss said it should be significant enough that I don't have to work my second job. This made me say hallelujah! I was excited and on top of the world all day. Nervous, happy, hopeful. All the usual emotions. The girls also took it pretty well but we are also operating under the impression this is temporary until my boss is back from her leave of absence. They don't know that she won't be coming back to the department.
Today, I took the dog to the vet. The usual. Ear infection, skin yadda yadda. I was talking with a new vet about how she is chronically itchy and having ear infections, and that steroides were the only thing that helped her, and I understand the risk to her liver but she is old, and she doesn't need to be uncomfortable all the time, and she agreed.
Then she did an examination, and found that all of her lymph nodes are enlarged. She said that some skin diseases can cause this to happen and she certainly has that in her favor, but I opted not to have them biopsied, because the usual bill for all her issues is already $200. There is a good chance that she has lymphoma, and I had to decide what to do for her, which wasn't easy. If I chose to treat it with steroides, which will also help her incessant itching, chemo would be out of the question, because it hinders its effectiveness.
I decided that I would do the steroides. She's 12, and realistically, doesn't have much time to live as it is, and chemo would be hard on her. It would also put me in the poor house. I can't really see that she would benefit from going through all of that, and in the meantime, be miserable and itchy with swollen ears. The vet said that the lymph nodes could decrease in size since she is on steroides, but without the biopsy we can't know for sure if it's cancer.
I'm being optomistic, and not thinking it's cancer. If it is she only has a couple of months to live, and I can't wrap my mind around that right now. I'm just going to give her the medicine, use reiki (which she hates!) and be positive. I hope that it doesn't come down to me having to decide to put her to sleep, that is the worst part of having pets.
Me and my punkinhead sharing a smootch!
Today, I took the dog to the vet. The usual. Ear infection, skin yadda yadda. I was talking with a new vet about how she is chronically itchy and having ear infections, and that steroides were the only thing that helped her, and I understand the risk to her liver but she is old, and she doesn't need to be uncomfortable all the time, and she agreed.
Then she did an examination, and found that all of her lymph nodes are enlarged. She said that some skin diseases can cause this to happen and she certainly has that in her favor, but I opted not to have them biopsied, because the usual bill for all her issues is already $200. There is a good chance that she has lymphoma, and I had to decide what to do for her, which wasn't easy. If I chose to treat it with steroides, which will also help her incessant itching, chemo would be out of the question, because it hinders its effectiveness.
I decided that I would do the steroides. She's 12, and realistically, doesn't have much time to live as it is, and chemo would be hard on her. It would also put me in the poor house. I can't really see that she would benefit from going through all of that, and in the meantime, be miserable and itchy with swollen ears. The vet said that the lymph nodes could decrease in size since she is on steroides, but without the biopsy we can't know for sure if it's cancer.
I'm being optomistic, and not thinking it's cancer. If it is she only has a couple of months to live, and I can't wrap my mind around that right now. I'm just going to give her the medicine, use reiki (which she hates!) and be positive. I hope that it doesn't come down to me having to decide to put her to sleep, that is the worst part of having pets.
Me and my punkinhead sharing a smootch!
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
How Sweet it Is...
What's the best compliment? Being appreciated for being yourself. My boyfriend gave me the best compliment, and that guy compliments me a lot. (blush!) He told me that its been good to have been with me thru the stuff he's going thru in his personal life. When I told him that was the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me, he told me he's learned a lot about himself, life, and love from his time with me.
I mean honestly? I am constantly amazed at the way I feel when I am with him. I am a caring, giving person, and until now, I have only been taken advantage of for being that way. You give a little, and someone wants it all. But with him? You give a little, and you get a little back. It's amazing to have that kind of relationship. And it isn't like an effort to me at all, I love doing things for him, it's the way that I am. I love that he appreciates it even more.
Even better is to have these feelings on top of the fact that I can't seem to keep my hands off that boy, and I can't get enough of him. I've definatly found something special with him, and I am never going to take that for granted. He's everything I've ever hoped to have with a man. And then some. I think this happens when you finally realize who you are, and start living for yourself. Stop denying yourself the things you really want. Stop settling.
My realignment plan at work was approved. I made a flowchart and everything, and tomorrow we present it to the girls. I am sorta nervous. I know I have no idea where this will lead, but what to keep in mind is, I am not going anywhere. I've been looking for a better paying, more challenging job for months, and come up with nothing. I'm still looking, and I told them that as well. Until I have the salary I deserve, and the work I enjoy, I'll keep looking. In the meantime, I'm going to take on more responsibility and stop being bored at work. If it pays off, great, if it doesn't, nothing lost, I'm still exploring other options.
What I do know is this. I can't wait to quit my second job!
I mean honestly? I am constantly amazed at the way I feel when I am with him. I am a caring, giving person, and until now, I have only been taken advantage of for being that way. You give a little, and someone wants it all. But with him? You give a little, and you get a little back. It's amazing to have that kind of relationship. And it isn't like an effort to me at all, I love doing things for him, it's the way that I am. I love that he appreciates it even more.
Even better is to have these feelings on top of the fact that I can't seem to keep my hands off that boy, and I can't get enough of him. I've definatly found something special with him, and I am never going to take that for granted. He's everything I've ever hoped to have with a man. And then some. I think this happens when you finally realize who you are, and start living for yourself. Stop denying yourself the things you really want. Stop settling.
My realignment plan at work was approved. I made a flowchart and everything, and tomorrow we present it to the girls. I am sorta nervous. I know I have no idea where this will lead, but what to keep in mind is, I am not going anywhere. I've been looking for a better paying, more challenging job for months, and come up with nothing. I'm still looking, and I told them that as well. Until I have the salary I deserve, and the work I enjoy, I'll keep looking. In the meantime, I'm going to take on more responsibility and stop being bored at work. If it pays off, great, if it doesn't, nothing lost, I'm still exploring other options.
What I do know is this. I can't wait to quit my second job!
I'm Bossy.....
I don't remember the last time I've been so busy. Oh yea, at my last job, where I enjoyed my work, and always had something to do. It's a nice change of pace. It's hectic, sometimes I wanna scream, but I love it. I always have worked best under pressure. This morning I met with my boss again about all the changes going on. We are going to restructure the department, and she wants me to come up with a realignment to present to her boss tomorrow. I will go from having three VP's to one. I'll take over training the new girl, many of my bosses reports, and managing the two remaining girls. The company is on a hiring freeze, and until that's lifted I have to help manage the workload and make things work with who is left. Uh, good luck?
The meeting was good. I learned that my boss's boss's boss is also on board with moving me forward into a supervisor position, which I'm told also comes along with a supervisor's salary. What that is, I don't know, and neither do they. Until we get thru this next three to four weeks, she said that isn't clear. She told me sometimes you have to jump on the bus and see where it takes you. And honestly, nothing else is in the works for me anyways, so what have I got to lose? I've applied for a billion jobs.
She told me she recommended me for that mentorship program before all this happened, because she see's a lot of potential in me, and I need to make other people see what she see's, and this is my chance to shine. She is leaving for surgery next week, and in the next week I have to learn how to do her two major reports that the girls rely on to do all their month end reporting. She complimented my positive attitude, the fact that I never lose my cool, and I am technically saavy. I'm excited. And I'm scared. And anxious. And scared. And nervous. And excited. I'm everything.
Today, they are making the announcement to the VP's in one of their meetings that in her absence I will be doing much of her work. I'm not sure how the girls will be told, but it makes me a bit nervous. Especially since I am good friends with one, and I happen to know she is also looking for other work. I have to still be friends, and manage at the same time. This is going to be a crazy time. I am not sure what will happen, how it will turn out, but I do have confidence in myself, and I know that they also have confidence in me. I'm strapping in for the ride. Wish me luck!
The meeting was good. I learned that my boss's boss's boss is also on board with moving me forward into a supervisor position, which I'm told also comes along with a supervisor's salary. What that is, I don't know, and neither do they. Until we get thru this next three to four weeks, she said that isn't clear. She told me sometimes you have to jump on the bus and see where it takes you. And honestly, nothing else is in the works for me anyways, so what have I got to lose? I've applied for a billion jobs.
She told me she recommended me for that mentorship program before all this happened, because she see's a lot of potential in me, and I need to make other people see what she see's, and this is my chance to shine. She is leaving for surgery next week, and in the next week I have to learn how to do her two major reports that the girls rely on to do all their month end reporting. She complimented my positive attitude, the fact that I never lose my cool, and I am technically saavy. I'm excited. And I'm scared. And anxious. And scared. And nervous. And excited. I'm everything.
Today, they are making the announcement to the VP's in one of their meetings that in her absence I will be doing much of her work. I'm not sure how the girls will be told, but it makes me a bit nervous. Especially since I am good friends with one, and I happen to know she is also looking for other work. I have to still be friends, and manage at the same time. This is going to be a crazy time. I am not sure what will happen, how it will turn out, but I do have confidence in myself, and I know that they also have confidence in me. I'm strapping in for the ride. Wish me luck!
Monday, February 18, 2008
Who's Line Is It?...
I really have no idea where the last week went. Usually my weeks zip by because of working so much, but now, I don't remember much about last week. Except, I didn't have time to surf the net at work. I guess that's a good thing. I feel better utilized in the workplace. We are two "men down" at month end with a huge annual meeting coming up, and a new person. Uh, we can barely find time to use the restroom.
I had a pretty fantastic weekend. I happened to see my boyfriend late Friday night for a rendevous, which was awesome, and I got to stay the night with him Fri, Sat, and Sun. I call that a little slice of heaven! I love being with him. I am always amazed at how happy he makes me, and how much I enjoy his company. It feels so right to be with him. What I don't call heavenly is having to leave his cuteness in the morning to go to freaking work(s).
Watched a really good new movie called "the brave one" with Jodie Foster. Never heard of it, but it's awesome. It'll piss you off, and then make you cheer. Best line ever? "I want my dog back". Yeaaaa! Rent it!
Second best line ever? CP emailed me last week to tell me he got a job, an he deleted 1,000 some emails which he didn't tell me to be a jerk, but it as a big step from him. Meaning, he deleted all our correspondance thru our relationship. I said "Good for you I bet you have a lot of free space in your mailbox now". Yea. I'm a pretty funny girl.
I had a pretty fantastic weekend. I happened to see my boyfriend late Friday night for a rendevous, which was awesome, and I got to stay the night with him Fri, Sat, and Sun. I call that a little slice of heaven! I love being with him. I am always amazed at how happy he makes me, and how much I enjoy his company. It feels so right to be with him. What I don't call heavenly is having to leave his cuteness in the morning to go to freaking work(s).
Watched a really good new movie called "the brave one" with Jodie Foster. Never heard of it, but it's awesome. It'll piss you off, and then make you cheer. Best line ever? "I want my dog back". Yeaaaa! Rent it!
Second best line ever? CP emailed me last week to tell me he got a job, an he deleted 1,000 some emails which he didn't tell me to be a jerk, but it as a big step from him. Meaning, he deleted all our correspondance thru our relationship. I said "Good for you I bet you have a lot of free space in your mailbox now". Yea. I'm a pretty funny girl.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Pardon Me...
Wow, I've been like, busy at my job. And, um, learning things, and using my brain, and actually the days are flying by and I havn't even noticed that I havn't blogged. Amazing what can happen when your talents are utilized. I've had the new girl under my wing for a couple of days. My boss is getting a list of things I do for the department, and what I can do of her job. And she asked me for my most high maintenance VP which is the one who gave me the crappy clock. Hopefully new girl gets him. That would just make my month. She currently only has two VPs and everyone else has 3. I think their going to re-align and everyone will get more, something else is changing around here.
No talk on money yet. Thats gonna have to happen in the next couple weeks. I only "need" 6 grand a year to be happy. I don't think that's too much to ask for at all. I'm excited to see where this leads!
I didn't get to see my valentine last night. He worked late, and has a lot going on, sooooo....I'm bummed. I understand, I was feeling that way not long ago I had so much going on I didnt know what to do first. I dealt with it by crying. A lot. I'm a girl. Ho hum. I miss him extra much. I can't wait til I can see him every day. I wonder sometimes wtf we are doing, but then I tell myself to enjoy the ride, it's become my personal mantra. Don't be in such a hurry. Sigh.
No talk on money yet. Thats gonna have to happen in the next couple weeks. I only "need" 6 grand a year to be happy. I don't think that's too much to ask for at all. I'm excited to see where this leads!
I didn't get to see my valentine last night. He worked late, and has a lot going on, sooooo....I'm bummed. I understand, I was feeling that way not long ago I had so much going on I didnt know what to do first. I dealt with it by crying. A lot. I'm a girl. Ho hum. I miss him extra much. I can't wait til I can see him every day. I wonder sometimes wtf we are doing, but then I tell myself to enjoy the ride, it's become my personal mantra. Don't be in such a hurry. Sigh.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Holeeee Shavitsky!...
This morning at work, my boss pulled me into an office with a big boss, and told me she is leaving the department, and to keep it on the DL (you guys wont tell, right?) but they want to replace her position with a supervisor/lead person who will be the contact person, and trainer, and go to person for the secreteries. My boss said I have the analytical skills, and the people skills to pull the job off.
They said they know I'm actively looking for another job and she said she thinks its mainly financial, and I said yes, I need more money. They said the job would come with a raise, but they are unsure what right now, they just wanted to see if I'm interested, and let me know they don't want to lose me, and if I get any offers to let them know, and they will let me know where they are in the process of the new position.
Me...in charge...it's about damn time. Yea!
They said they know I'm actively looking for another job and she said she thinks its mainly financial, and I said yes, I need more money. They said the job would come with a raise, but they are unsure what right now, they just wanted to see if I'm interested, and let me know they don't want to lose me, and if I get any offers to let them know, and they will let me know where they are in the process of the new position.
Me...in charge...it's about damn time. Yea!
Battoning down the hatches...
There's a storm a brewin'. The second job said no penalty if we dont go in on Tuesday. Technically, it is Tuesday, but only midnight. Spose to get 8 inches I think, and like Kat said, that's not 8 inches in a good way. Wink, wink. I'm hoping we get called off work in the morning. Nevermind that I havn't been there for 4 days. I'm friggin sick people. I took mucinex and all that did was make me hack up both lungs. Not much mucus either. Mmmm. Mommas been at her friends and wont come back til im better. Today she got me medicine, and vicks, and cough drops. Know why it's awesome to have your Mommy back? There's a reason!
So Saturday night my guy came over, and he is just about the cutest thing on earth. Yea, he really is. He made us (fake...mmm and he ate some) chicken quesedillas. And some velveeta and chili dip. While we were in the kitchen we did gross stuff like kiss, and grab each other's butts, and flirt, and giggle... all that lovey dovey stuff that use to make me puke. The food was good, but it made me sweat from the spices. He also patted my back cus he said it would help, what do I know he's the paramedic, and it did feel good. Dinner was yummy, but the best part was cuddlin up on the couch to watch a movie under the comforter. Ahhhh. I love that one. A whole lotta lot! I am gonna steal him up some day I don't know how but I will....*devises evil plan*
He also gave me his old mp3 player! Me, living in the 21st century. Hellooo...Can you even believe it? I am so excited! He even put some meditations on there for me, one for sleep, and one for concentration that I tried out at work typing, it's awesome. I can't begin to explain how freaking cool it is to have a guy in my life that is into the same spirituality as me. I guess I know now why say, Catholics stick together. It does make a difference.
So, I've been saving all sorts of stuff to my new mp3 player. I'm in the process of downloading a Nora Roberts book to listen to at work! How fun is that? Oh, did I mention how I've been subpoena'd due to not paying my local taxes where I live? Nice. Haul me away why doncha. Like I didn't pay the city I work in 2% already? Plus, I owe federal $196. I just love tax season, don't you?
So Saturday night my guy came over, and he is just about the cutest thing on earth. Yea, he really is. He made us (fake...mmm and he ate some) chicken quesedillas. And some velveeta and chili dip. While we were in the kitchen we did gross stuff like kiss, and grab each other's butts, and flirt, and giggle... all that lovey dovey stuff that use to make me puke. The food was good, but it made me sweat from the spices. He also patted my back cus he said it would help, what do I know he's the paramedic, and it did feel good. Dinner was yummy, but the best part was cuddlin up on the couch to watch a movie under the comforter. Ahhhh. I love that one. A whole lotta lot! I am gonna steal him up some day I don't know how but I will....*devises evil plan*
He also gave me his old mp3 player! Me, living in the 21st century. Hellooo...Can you even believe it? I am so excited! He even put some meditations on there for me, one for sleep, and one for concentration that I tried out at work typing, it's awesome. I can't begin to explain how freaking cool it is to have a guy in my life that is into the same spirituality as me. I guess I know now why say, Catholics stick together. It does make a difference.
So, I've been saving all sorts of stuff to my new mp3 player. I'm in the process of downloading a Nora Roberts book to listen to at work! How fun is that? Oh, did I mention how I've been subpoena'd due to not paying my local taxes where I live? Nice. Haul me away why doncha. Like I didn't pay the city I work in 2% already? Plus, I owe federal $196. I just love tax season, don't you?
Friday, February 08, 2008
Admitting Defeat...
Eventually, you gotta admit when you've been defeated. Like today. I'm sick. Unable to talk. Not being able to talk makes me angry. So does typing on my computer at home cus my space bar barely works. grrr.
Possible good news for me..my friend who's been trying to get me into the university called me to say they will be hiring in her husbands department. Wish me luck! Better news? My Momma bought a house yesterday. Here. In Ohio!! Her and my sister are nervous about it (sister is staying in VA) I am at peace having her here. It feels nice for once! My brother will have a place to stay that isn't a shithole. I dont have to worry about him. It would seem things may be looking up for me. Now, it's time to get that new job, and quit the second one.
Last night at the second job I almost biffed it cus I straight fell asleep while working. I have dozed off plenty and woke up when I started to drift, but last night was deeper and I woke up suddenly, and almost fell out of my chair, and caused a ruckus and everyone saw me. It was the funniest thing, but also quite sad. Why is it again that I'm killing myself working?
Oh yes, because I learned long ago, that the only person you can depend on is yourself. And, no one is going to be rescuing me. When I finally do land a good job and I can quit, I know one thing, I'm never working two jobs again. I've spent the last 3 1/2 years doing it. It's so hard to make it on your own. But I also like being on my own, so I shouldn't complain. I do get pissed off when I get shutoffs for electric, or tax bills, when there are people who sit on their asses and live off the government, when they are able to work. I despise laziness. I have a right to.
And, so...LOST?? Hello writer's strike? Get over yourselves. If you make me wait another 6 months for Lost episodes (only 6 new ones left!!!!!) you're going down. What....the fuck? I think I could watch this one 15 times and never get it. Did you notice the guy last week who visited Hurly in the psych ward, when he left he turned into black mist? His name is Abbaddon, which is in the bible as a reference to the devil or keeper of lost souls, according to Wikipedia. Is his "team" in on the lost souls collection? If the losties are dead, how the hell do they get off the island in flash forwards? I wonder if the pilot who flew the copter to the island was that old when the plane crashed?
How is the pilot in the ocean? He was ripped to shreds in season one by 'the monster' and plopped in a tree? Last week Hurley saw Jack's dad in the cabin in the chair like Jacob. It really was Jacks dad! This new pilot with the copter...looked to me to be Jacob. Huh? Thoughts? What about that dude that is a ghost buster? Obviously there is a reason he is on the team. Did it appear to anyone else when these people arrived on the island last night, they did it thru a sort of worm hole? How'd that cow with the big nads get there? Like the horse?
How did Ben have his picture taken, and piss people off that aren't on the island, when he's spent his whole life there? Is he a sort of "legend"? Maybe he is an apparition in the photo? The ghostbuster guy could've gotten his picture w/his weird ghostbusty vaccume thing? Where was that team digging that found the polar bear...in the desert? Until I am well enough to surf the net to find all the easter eggs..I'm baffled. I Love a show that makes me think. To see who won Lost-vivor go to Apropos of Something.
Possible good news for me..my friend who's been trying to get me into the university called me to say they will be hiring in her husbands department. Wish me luck! Better news? My Momma bought a house yesterday. Here. In Ohio!! Her and my sister are nervous about it (sister is staying in VA) I am at peace having her here. It feels nice for once! My brother will have a place to stay that isn't a shithole. I dont have to worry about him. It would seem things may be looking up for me. Now, it's time to get that new job, and quit the second one.
Last night at the second job I almost biffed it cus I straight fell asleep while working. I have dozed off plenty and woke up when I started to drift, but last night was deeper and I woke up suddenly, and almost fell out of my chair, and caused a ruckus and everyone saw me. It was the funniest thing, but also quite sad. Why is it again that I'm killing myself working?
Oh yes, because I learned long ago, that the only person you can depend on is yourself. And, no one is going to be rescuing me. When I finally do land a good job and I can quit, I know one thing, I'm never working two jobs again. I've spent the last 3 1/2 years doing it. It's so hard to make it on your own. But I also like being on my own, so I shouldn't complain. I do get pissed off when I get shutoffs for electric, or tax bills, when there are people who sit on their asses and live off the government, when they are able to work. I despise laziness. I have a right to.
And, so...LOST?? Hello writer's strike? Get over yourselves. If you make me wait another 6 months for Lost episodes (only 6 new ones left!!!!!) you're going down. What....the fuck? I think I could watch this one 15 times and never get it. Did you notice the guy last week who visited Hurly in the psych ward, when he left he turned into black mist? His name is Abbaddon, which is in the bible as a reference to the devil or keeper of lost souls, according to Wikipedia. Is his "team" in on the lost souls collection? If the losties are dead, how the hell do they get off the island in flash forwards? I wonder if the pilot who flew the copter to the island was that old when the plane crashed?
How is the pilot in the ocean? He was ripped to shreds in season one by 'the monster' and plopped in a tree? Last week Hurley saw Jack's dad in the cabin in the chair like Jacob. It really was Jacks dad! This new pilot with the copter...looked to me to be Jacob. Huh? Thoughts? What about that dude that is a ghost buster? Obviously there is a reason he is on the team. Did it appear to anyone else when these people arrived on the island last night, they did it thru a sort of worm hole? How'd that cow with the big nads get there? Like the horse?
How did Ben have his picture taken, and piss people off that aren't on the island, when he's spent his whole life there? Is he a sort of "legend"? Maybe he is an apparition in the photo? The ghostbuster guy could've gotten his picture w/his weird ghostbusty vaccume thing? Where was that team digging that found the polar bear...in the desert? Until I am well enough to surf the net to find all the easter eggs..I'm baffled. I Love a show that makes me think. To see who won Lost-vivor go to Apropos of Something.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Ass...
Oh, Hi. I feel like ass today. I don't even have the energy to try to make myself feel better. Bah! I had a fantastic evening with my boyfriend, as usual. It was nice having some alone time. My Momma went to stay with a friend for a while. She said she'd call but she hasn't. Hater. Me and the man went to rent some movies, and he made some dip. We had a fantastic snuggle on the couch, and I fell asleep early, after midnight. I might add, this was after he was snoring already.
The hardest thing to do is to wake up and get out of a comfy bed with the guy your crazy about, and go to work, while he is still snoozing...all cute n stuff. It makes me angry. I dunno why I can't be independently wealthy and spend all my time lounging around with him and being joyfully in love. Damn, life is so unfair.
No, instead I'm at work. With a congested chest, and sore throat, making freaking phone calls all day when it hurts to talk. Wishing I was home. Or at least at a better paying job so I could go home at 5 like most people. I'm working on my master plan for kidnapping my guy. I have to come up with a way to make it seem as if he isn't missing...so no one will look for him. Leaving him is so hard, I dunno if I've mentioned this before? Oh yea, I might have. I know...enjoy the journey. Easier said than done!
I finally figured out how to access my W-2 online from my second job. So this weekend I can file my taxes. I don't expect a refund, but let us all hope that I don't have to pay again. I claim myself cus I'm poor, so I usually owe, or get pennies back. Cus, you know, I work two jobs to pay the government, not because I need the money to survive or anything.
I also got more information about vet tech school. Which I reallllllly want to do. But I don't even want to make my appointment to meet with them, until I know when I can go. I can't go until I get a better job so I can stop working two. Also, moving would be ideal, since school's in Cleveland, and I am in BFE. And, we know how my search for a new apartment is going. Oh, you don't? Well, I havn't found a freaking thing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. I'm not worrying about all of this either. I know it's all going to come together one day. I applied for a few more jobs at Akron University, and another accounting firm. Pretty soon everyone in the tri state area is going to know my name, cus I'll have applied to work there.
The hardest thing to do is to wake up and get out of a comfy bed with the guy your crazy about, and go to work, while he is still snoozing...all cute n stuff. It makes me angry. I dunno why I can't be independently wealthy and spend all my time lounging around with him and being joyfully in love. Damn, life is so unfair.
No, instead I'm at work. With a congested chest, and sore throat, making freaking phone calls all day when it hurts to talk. Wishing I was home. Or at least at a better paying job so I could go home at 5 like most people. I'm working on my master plan for kidnapping my guy. I have to come up with a way to make it seem as if he isn't missing...so no one will look for him. Leaving him is so hard, I dunno if I've mentioned this before? Oh yea, I might have. I know...enjoy the journey. Easier said than done!
I finally figured out how to access my W-2 online from my second job. So this weekend I can file my taxes. I don't expect a refund, but let us all hope that I don't have to pay again. I claim myself cus I'm poor, so I usually owe, or get pennies back. Cus, you know, I work two jobs to pay the government, not because I need the money to survive or anything.
I also got more information about vet tech school. Which I reallllllly want to do. But I don't even want to make my appointment to meet with them, until I know when I can go. I can't go until I get a better job so I can stop working two. Also, moving would be ideal, since school's in Cleveland, and I am in BFE. And, we know how my search for a new apartment is going. Oh, you don't? Well, I havn't found a freaking thing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. I'm not worrying about all of this either. I know it's all going to come together one day. I applied for a few more jobs at Akron University, and another accounting firm. Pretty soon everyone in the tri state area is going to know my name, cus I'll have applied to work there.
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Essential Reiki...
First things first, so, I'm not a millionaire. It's a disappointment cus I really thought I was winning. I didn't just hope think, I thought. It all started with doing the lottery job at work #2 last week. I had a feeling to play. All weekend I thought about it. I kept getting the urge to play. I got the excitement in my stomach like when you are going on vacation. Like I was really winning. I thought all yesterday about what I was doing with the money! I got a shut off notice on my electric. (which, they can fuck off cus I owe $106, and I've owed over $600 and never been shut off! I pay over half of what's due every month) In my diversity class? We talked about winning the lottery. At work, after I bought my ticket? I found my car buddha who's been missing for over a month, in my work bag. Signs? No...*Sigh* I'm not a millionaire.
I could attribute my "good feelings" to having my Reiki Attunement. My intuition has always been pretty good, but I would tend to stuff the thoughts I had down, and not trust them. What do I know? The more I listen to myself I see that I am more right than wrong, and it is a comfort. After an attunement, they say one of your senses will heighten and maybe I got my hopes up that it was intuition. All I can really say about my experience, is...woa. They say it will take 21 days to fully take effect, and it's life changing.
I have been struggling for about a year now, to find purpose in my life. I've read about Reiki for around two years, and kept wanting to get an attunement so I could help animals with it. (The short description is, Reiki is a Japanese art of healing using life energy) I put it off because the classes were in Cleveland, only twice a year, and very costly. The first step to finding my purpose in my opinion was reading the secret. Gaining the knowledge that you really can have everything you want, if you believe it. Change your thoughts, change your life, and much, much more.
Latley, I've been losing sight of all of this, and letting worry and stress come into my life. I knew I wanted more, but didn't know how to get it. That's when a friend from school offered to give me an attunement as a gift, because I kept asking about it, but couldn't afford the class. He said he and his wife had a feeling to do it and they learned not to ignore those pushes. I couldn't agree more. (except in the case of the lottery &*^%$#@)
The only thing I can use to describe being attuned, is the feeling I got in a group meditation when I was at the A.R.E with my sister this past September. it was a peaceful, whole feeling. And, my hands tingled. Afterwards, I tried it out on a level II practicioner. I really didn't expect to be able to feel anything, cus I've been touching people for a long time, (wink!)and not "feeling" anything. I did though. I could clearly feel vibrations coming off of her body, at about 6 inches above her. Hers were equal from top to bottom. She had just had an attunement, and the teacher said she should be consistant, but if there were a change in energy that was the chakra that is blocked.
That evening, I did a "Quick" treatment on my boyfriend. He'd been sick with a cold and cough, and is having neck pain. So, I did a quick treatment. He told me afterwards, that he felt tingly. Later, he said he felt "weird" and couldn't explain it. I let him know that if you are sick you can experience a "detox" and feel worse all at once, but then better. Which, the next day he said he did in fact feel better. He wasn't sick. Say whaaa? But then Monday, he says he felt more tired than usual. We were up til 4 am two days in a row. That was my first thought.
I reiki'd the cats, who seemed to enjoy it. The dog wasn't having it. She needs it most of all! The more I read about animal reiki, the more interested I am. How they take on our energies, and often don't want to be healed of it, because they are our protectors and see it as their purpose. I've communicated with my pets lots of times, using a pendulum. Which some people would think is crazy, but I am positive this is why our bonds are so strong. And even though it drives my Mom crazy, I'll never "come to my senses" and get rid of any of them. They are my heart.
Then..yesterday, out of nowhere I got a head cold, or sinus problems that normally would linger forever. Bam, runny, i went through half a box of kleenex, watery eyes, sneezing. But I 'felt' fine. I treated myself, and it went away. I mean, it went right away. It all may seem hard to believe if you know nothing about it, it was to me, and I'd studied it for a long time now. All I do know, is that I am filled with an inner peace that I am welcoming. I havn't stressed out about moving. Or finding a job. I'm letting things happen as they are meant to. And above all else, THAT is what I needed at this point in my life.
Oh, and this shirt came in the mail Monday from Cafe Press...love iiiit.
I could attribute my "good feelings" to having my Reiki Attunement. My intuition has always been pretty good, but I would tend to stuff the thoughts I had down, and not trust them. What do I know? The more I listen to myself I see that I am more right than wrong, and it is a comfort. After an attunement, they say one of your senses will heighten and maybe I got my hopes up that it was intuition. All I can really say about my experience, is...woa. They say it will take 21 days to fully take effect, and it's life changing.
I have been struggling for about a year now, to find purpose in my life. I've read about Reiki for around two years, and kept wanting to get an attunement so I could help animals with it. (The short description is, Reiki is a Japanese art of healing using life energy) I put it off because the classes were in Cleveland, only twice a year, and very costly. The first step to finding my purpose in my opinion was reading the secret. Gaining the knowledge that you really can have everything you want, if you believe it. Change your thoughts, change your life, and much, much more.
Latley, I've been losing sight of all of this, and letting worry and stress come into my life. I knew I wanted more, but didn't know how to get it. That's when a friend from school offered to give me an attunement as a gift, because I kept asking about it, but couldn't afford the class. He said he and his wife had a feeling to do it and they learned not to ignore those pushes. I couldn't agree more. (except in the case of the lottery &*^%$#@)
The only thing I can use to describe being attuned, is the feeling I got in a group meditation when I was at the A.R.E with my sister this past September. it was a peaceful, whole feeling. And, my hands tingled. Afterwards, I tried it out on a level II practicioner. I really didn't expect to be able to feel anything, cus I've been touching people for a long time, (wink!)and not "feeling" anything. I did though. I could clearly feel vibrations coming off of her body, at about 6 inches above her. Hers were equal from top to bottom. She had just had an attunement, and the teacher said she should be consistant, but if there were a change in energy that was the chakra that is blocked.
That evening, I did a "Quick" treatment on my boyfriend. He'd been sick with a cold and cough, and is having neck pain. So, I did a quick treatment. He told me afterwards, that he felt tingly. Later, he said he felt "weird" and couldn't explain it. I let him know that if you are sick you can experience a "detox" and feel worse all at once, but then better. Which, the next day he said he did in fact feel better. He wasn't sick. Say whaaa? But then Monday, he says he felt more tired than usual. We were up til 4 am two days in a row. That was my first thought.
I reiki'd the cats, who seemed to enjoy it. The dog wasn't having it. She needs it most of all! The more I read about animal reiki, the more interested I am. How they take on our energies, and often don't want to be healed of it, because they are our protectors and see it as their purpose. I've communicated with my pets lots of times, using a pendulum. Which some people would think is crazy, but I am positive this is why our bonds are so strong. And even though it drives my Mom crazy, I'll never "come to my senses" and get rid of any of them. They are my heart.
Then..yesterday, out of nowhere I got a head cold, or sinus problems that normally would linger forever. Bam, runny, i went through half a box of kleenex, watery eyes, sneezing. But I 'felt' fine. I treated myself, and it went away. I mean, it went right away. It all may seem hard to believe if you know nothing about it, it was to me, and I'd studied it for a long time now. All I do know, is that I am filled with an inner peace that I am welcoming. I havn't stressed out about moving. Or finding a job. I'm letting things happen as they are meant to. And above all else, THAT is what I needed at this point in my life.
Oh, and this shirt came in the mail Monday from Cafe Press...love iiiit.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Well, it's Monday...
Yes, I've been busy today, making calls to stores, asking for pictures of people. People who won trips to Hawaii. Yea, I got to hear people say how they have been there already and aren't excited about the trip they WON, and don't have to PAY for, or use their VACATION time to go on. Some people are fucking ungrateful, that's what they are!
I didn't go to work on Friday night, instead, I went to Cleveland and had a fantastic evening with my boyfriend! We went to dinner with some of his friends, and went to a few bars. At first, I thought we were in a gay bar, cus there were a lot of gay folks, don't get me wrong, I think whatever floats your boat! But, I'm from a small town in comparison, we don't see that very much. One guy and girl did like a coreographed dance to Justin Timberlake. Like in the movies, it was hilarious.
I was actually hit on at the next bar when I went to get bar sour for the man (he had hiccups, it works). Know how long it's been since a complete stranger tried to pick me up? Long time. I told him I was getting a drink for my boyfriend, and left. Being hit on also makes me uncomfortable! We ended the evening at a hookha bar, which was a first for me, and a pretty good time! There were comfy couches, and we got grape flavored. Mmmmm. I had so much fun hangin with my guy, and his friends, it's nice to feel like a part of his life.
Saturday I had to be up at the buttcrack of dawn ( 7:30 after going to bed around 4 am) to take my Reiki class. Which, I'll blog about another time, cus it was quite amazing. Then I picked my Momma up and we went to get our hair done. I was so hungry and tired I was sick. Bleh. Momma got me some cheese sticks though, not the best thing to eat but it got rid of the nausea! I got another color in with my normal hilights, to darken it up a bit. It's not a huge difference but it looks better. After that I took mom around to look at houses cus she is considering moving back up here. I'm not holding my breath or anything. It would be nice, but...
Then I finally took a 2 hour nap and got myself ready to go out again, with my peeps, and the man. We went to the local bar, and had a lot of fun. I lost at silverstrike. I didn't even break 100. Boo. I enjoyed flirting with my guy, and grabbing his butt and what-not, which one cannot help cus it's so grab-able. Kat's boss thought he was my brother, so that was the joke of the evening. My brother is HOTTTT! We left that bar and went to the pool hall for about an hour. The topic of conversation was anal bleaching, seventies bush, and childbirth. Wow, we're freaking cool!
Yesterday we got up early too, at like 10, but we had a nice wake up wink wink. Then he took me to Bob Evans for a delicious breakfast, and we ended up napping together on the couch downstairs listening to some tunes. *sigh* it was quite awesome spending a whole weekend with my guy, which is even more incentive to quit the second job. I hope it isn't long til I can afford it. I miss life. He makes me giddy, I can't stand it!
I didn't go to work on Friday night, instead, I went to Cleveland and had a fantastic evening with my boyfriend! We went to dinner with some of his friends, and went to a few bars. At first, I thought we were in a gay bar, cus there were a lot of gay folks, don't get me wrong, I think whatever floats your boat! But, I'm from a small town in comparison, we don't see that very much. One guy and girl did like a coreographed dance to Justin Timberlake. Like in the movies, it was hilarious.
I was actually hit on at the next bar when I went to get bar sour for the man (he had hiccups, it works). Know how long it's been since a complete stranger tried to pick me up? Long time. I told him I was getting a drink for my boyfriend, and left. Being hit on also makes me uncomfortable! We ended the evening at a hookha bar, which was a first for me, and a pretty good time! There were comfy couches, and we got grape flavored. Mmmmm. I had so much fun hangin with my guy, and his friends, it's nice to feel like a part of his life.
Saturday I had to be up at the buttcrack of dawn ( 7:30 after going to bed around 4 am) to take my Reiki class. Which, I'll blog about another time, cus it was quite amazing. Then I picked my Momma up and we went to get our hair done. I was so hungry and tired I was sick. Bleh. Momma got me some cheese sticks though, not the best thing to eat but it got rid of the nausea! I got another color in with my normal hilights, to darken it up a bit. It's not a huge difference but it looks better. After that I took mom around to look at houses cus she is considering moving back up here. I'm not holding my breath or anything. It would be nice, but...
Then I finally took a 2 hour nap and got myself ready to go out again, with my peeps, and the man. We went to the local bar, and had a lot of fun. I lost at silverstrike. I didn't even break 100. Boo. I enjoyed flirting with my guy, and grabbing his butt and what-not, which one cannot help cus it's so grab-able. Kat's boss thought he was my brother, so that was the joke of the evening. My brother is HOTTTT! We left that bar and went to the pool hall for about an hour. The topic of conversation was anal bleaching, seventies bush, and childbirth. Wow, we're freaking cool!
Yesterday we got up early too, at like 10, but we had a nice wake up wink wink. Then he took me to Bob Evans for a delicious breakfast, and we ended up napping together on the couch downstairs listening to some tunes. *sigh* it was quite awesome spending a whole weekend with my guy, which is even more incentive to quit the second job. I hope it isn't long til I can afford it. I miss life. He makes me giddy, I can't stand it!
Friday, February 01, 2008
Lost Was Found Again!...
Lost. Thank you for returning, and making me use my brain. Are you guys in another time? When you come back from the island, are you already in the 'real world' still living your lives, and now there are two of you? I think that may be the case. And in last seasons finale, when Jack was gonna kill himself, it's cus himself died. I think he visited himself at the funeral home. That's why he was so upset.
What's up with that dude visiting Hurley in the mental hospital? Is he aware of Dharma, or the others? Pretty sweet that Kate stayed with Jack. I think it's cus he spilled the beans about loving her. Girls always pick the good guy. Eat that Sawyer! Obviously Locke's plan to hide doesn't work, if Hurley is already back home.
My scope says this today:
A new friendship will take a very unusual direction today. Are you ready to commit at a deeper level? If you are unsure about things, you had better communicate that to them as clearly as you can. They will totally understand how you're feeling, which will only help you see them as the more positive influence over your life. They listen to you and respect your needs -- what more do you need? You are in a much healthier phase, now, and you're attracting much healthier people. Getting what you want can be just as disorienting as not getting it. You're figuring out that contentment doesn't come from stuff or jobs or relationships -- it comes from within. Some people never get that.
I'm 99% sure I'm calling off the second job again. Why? Why not. I have the opportunity to go out with this really awesome guy, and by that, I mean my boyfriend. So, what the fuck. I'm always responsible, once in a while it won't kill me to enjoy myself. Besides my horoscope says that I need to find contentment from within. All the money in the world isn't gonna do it. So, if I get canned, it's meant to be. Besides I helped out on a new job last night and received a ton of praise from the supervisor, who emailed the big wigs. The job? Lottery winners claim forms. You know how many people win scratch off's and smaller amounts, like 25 grand? A fuckton. I've decided to play the lotto, as I see it as a sign.
CP emailed me yesterday. It had been a while. He told me all about how much god has blessed him. Good for you. If you want to give credit away for what you change in your life to someone else. My beliefs are far different, but to each their own. God also brought a special friend into his life, which I think he might have told me to try and make me jealous, but really everyone deserves someone that makes them feel good. So, have at it. I'm in my own happy place in life, and nothing is going to make me jealous of anyone.
I've got a busy busy weekend. I'm getting up at the buttcrack of dawn and taking my reiki class, which I am totally psyched about. Then I have a long over-due hair appointment, and taking my Momma to look at houses I guess. Then she prob needs to go to the store. And I have to cram in a workout, shower, and getting my shit together to go out and kickit. I guess I have a busy Saturday. Sunday may be much easier.
What's up with that dude visiting Hurley in the mental hospital? Is he aware of Dharma, or the others? Pretty sweet that Kate stayed with Jack. I think it's cus he spilled the beans about loving her. Girls always pick the good guy. Eat that Sawyer! Obviously Locke's plan to hide doesn't work, if Hurley is already back home.
My scope says this today:
A new friendship will take a very unusual direction today. Are you ready to commit at a deeper level? If you are unsure about things, you had better communicate that to them as clearly as you can. They will totally understand how you're feeling, which will only help you see them as the more positive influence over your life. They listen to you and respect your needs -- what more do you need? You are in a much healthier phase, now, and you're attracting much healthier people. Getting what you want can be just as disorienting as not getting it. You're figuring out that contentment doesn't come from stuff or jobs or relationships -- it comes from within. Some people never get that.
I'm 99% sure I'm calling off the second job again. Why? Why not. I have the opportunity to go out with this really awesome guy, and by that, I mean my boyfriend. So, what the fuck. I'm always responsible, once in a while it won't kill me to enjoy myself. Besides my horoscope says that I need to find contentment from within. All the money in the world isn't gonna do it. So, if I get canned, it's meant to be. Besides I helped out on a new job last night and received a ton of praise from the supervisor, who emailed the big wigs. The job? Lottery winners claim forms. You know how many people win scratch off's and smaller amounts, like 25 grand? A fuckton. I've decided to play the lotto, as I see it as a sign.
CP emailed me yesterday. It had been a while. He told me all about how much god has blessed him. Good for you. If you want to give credit away for what you change in your life to someone else. My beliefs are far different, but to each their own. God also brought a special friend into his life, which I think he might have told me to try and make me jealous, but really everyone deserves someone that makes them feel good. So, have at it. I'm in my own happy place in life, and nothing is going to make me jealous of anyone.
I've got a busy busy weekend. I'm getting up at the buttcrack of dawn and taking my reiki class, which I am totally psyched about. Then I have a long over-due hair appointment, and taking my Momma to look at houses I guess. Then she prob needs to go to the store. And I have to cram in a workout, shower, and getting my shit together to go out and kickit. I guess I have a busy Saturday. Sunday may be much easier.
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