"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Monday, July 21, 2014

The Downside of Pets...

I can only think of one downside to having pets and that is...having to say goodbye.

This weekend, I said goodbye to the most perfect cat in the universe, my Fizzgig!

Fizzgig had a motor purr that you could hear rooms away, and there was rarely a time that she was not running that motor! Secretly "the favorite" she always came when called, never turned down a snuggle, and loved her whisker lickin' treats more than anything else.

Everyone loved her because she had the most gentle temperment, despite her "grumpy face". 

She had been getting frequent urinary tract infections, and had kidney disease for about a year. She was managing the kidney thing pretty well with her incessant drinking, and diet. Other than that you'd never know there was a thing wrong with her. 

This past week she started hiding...and she never hides. Even when she was sick with a UTI, she was more lethargic, but always around me.

So I made a Saturday appointment suspecting another UTI. But Thursday night, in the span of a couple of hours, she was purring, laying down...and slowly rolled to her side, took a deep breath, and essentially..."died" for a couple seconds. It was very unexpected and I called my Mom hysterical.

We agreed that if she seemed to be in no pain, to just let her go. The first couple times I shook her, and she came out of it dazed, and went about her business eating, drinking, using the litter box..but she'd hide in the kitty tunnel, and did the same thing a dozen or so times. 

I changed her appointment to the next day, and all night I layed with her, battling with the decision to put her down. 

Mr. Magoo wanted to be near her the last day, he has the sweetest soul..

At the vet, she told me that her heart rate was really, really slow, especially given that she was at the vet. She said we should do an xray to see what's going on with it. And really, what did it matter? Her heart was obviously affected enough so that it stopped beating several times the previous night.

As hard for me as it was, and as awful as it sounded coming out of my mouth I said " she's almost sixteen, and I don't want to put her through anything else to prolong her suffering, I can't watch her go through another night like we had, so I think it's time to let her go". 

Deep down I knew I was going there to euthanize her.

She leaves a big hole in my heart, but also in the kitty hearts of these guys...

Her 14 year old son Peekachu

And 14 year old daughter Fozzie

More than my sadness, her babies have never known a life without her, and it's the first time in losing a pet that I have had to deal with real pet grief, which makes it all that more difficult to move on from.

Fizzie lovin the boxed wine!

We lose pets all the time, and it's never easy. However, I am really missing my little "gigabyte"...we had a special bond.

To some, seems I've had a bout of "bad luck" with my pets lately, but they have all lived well into their teens, and I am grateful for that. I've taken very good care of them, and they have lived long, happy, lives as adored little additions to my life.

R.I.P. little Fizzgig. 1998-2014


Monica @ The Hot Mess Express said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've read your blog for a LONG time and know how much your furry bebes mean to you. Once again, I'm really sorry and hopefully you can find yourself smiling soon. Abrazos! Monica

Urban Cynic said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your darling Fizzgig. I have lost a couple of cats - the hardest one was Fraidycat who I had for 14 years and who had to be put down on her birthday - so I know how hard it is and how you must feel.

It must also be a little consolation at least to know that she couldn't have had a more loving owner, better companions or a happier life. No pet could ever want for more. x

Teena in Toronto said...

I'm really sorry for your loss. They give us so much joy and it's hard to say good-bye.

Debbie @ Live from La Quinta said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how much your pets mean to you. They're your children! I get it (you know I do :-) ). You and your furry family are in my thoughts.