All Work and No Play Makes Jack....

A DULL BOY!!

There is a word for it actually. I think it occurs most often after weddings. You feel let down after all the pent up excitement or something? I dunno, I feel like crap though. It might also be due to the fact that the only leaving the house I did for the past 3 days was for 5 min yesterday while driving to the library to drop off books.

That, and I got PMS. I also have a stomach ache from not eating right for a week, and my whole body is retaining boatloads of water due to PMS, and...well, not drinking enough water. So I just feel like crap in general. Top that off with coming back to work(s) and you have one pissed off chick!

Yesterday was me and CP's 6 month mile marker. Neither of us realized this, until I brought it up in bed. Half a year. Wow. Time flies!

On the way to work this morning I was wondering again about when I can quit my second job. I'm thinking, the more I delay it the harder it will be. People always tell you when to have kids, that if you wait til your ready you'll never have them. I think this is the same thing. I'll always need the money so long as I'm making it. I really want to quit. I really want to go back to the gym when I was happy. I felt so much better. I want to have a clean house. A life. Friends. I think its the estrogen getting to me. It happens.

Me and CP need to shit or get off the pot with the wedding arrangements. I really wanna get married this year, but I seriously doubt that is financially possible. I had a small first wedding, and still got a loan for 5 grand. I'm not taking out one single solitary loan!! Plus, I want us to have our affairs in order first! Meaning, our own freaking finances! I want us to be debt free (mostly) going into it, so we can have a fresh start. I can't do that AND save up for a wedding. All by myself to boot!! So....check back on this ongoing saga of.......will she ever get married?!! Not looking so hopeful. Might have to be spring 2007 !! Maybe we'll live in semi-sin forever. (semi, cus we're engaged, God appreciates that!)

So, the question on my mind today is, how to get everything I need done so I can quit my mutha fuckin second job!!!!!!!! I have to stay at least thru January to get my $200 insurance money. After that, I'm not responsible for!

I also know, that I'll get to work tonight and probably be ok with it. It is just that having 3 days off gives one a glimmer of hope....a look into what it is like to have a life, and...you want more. Cus, having a life for me now, means I have time to do laundry and clean other than midnight! I'd like to have a life where I can go DO SOMETHING during the WEEK! GASP!

Christmas, it was like 60 degrees, the snow melted. I turned the heat off cus it was freaking hot! Yesterday, freezing cold again. I think Ohio owns the rights to fucking with your seasonal minds. No wonder there are so many murderers and psychopaths here!

I love Forever Eden. I forgot all about the shit that went down on that show, why did they take it off again? Ohhhhhhh yes, there was a story line, it was entertaining, and it was on FOX. Fox cancels everything good! Tru Calling anyone? Reunion anyone? Forever EDEN!? This guy Wallace was playing 2 chicks on the island. Mind you they all live together, sooooooo it was great! They had a trial that they never aired, and they were sentenced to sit in a jail for 3 hours together, while he had to listen to the truth which drove him crazy! He had to face that he had hurt 2 women. I hope his dick fell off eventually! Asshole!

Katie told me Lane Bryant is having a freaking bra sale! Buy 2 get 2 free!!!! That means, I'm going to have to spend 50 bucks on bras, but I'll get $100 in merchandise!!!! Get out there and give your girls a lift gals! Tis the season for new bras! Know how long its been since I had cute bras? Since I wore a B cup. You do the math! That was long, long, long ago!

Today's Question:

What would you most easily be driven to kill for?

My life. Or, if someone catches me on a bad day I can't be held responsible.