Hopeful...

I'm on day 9 of having partial hearing. I've been sick 15 days. I went to urgent care a week ago with a horrid ear infection following the worst pain I've ever felt..which turns out was a ruptured ear drum due to a sinus infection/strep throat.

I still can't hear out of my left ear and the extreme annoyance, and lonliness at work because its so quiet can't be described. I'm on medicine, but it just takes time. And a follow up appointment in 4 days with my regular Dr.

I feel fine now, aside from occasional sharp pricks in my ear, and being hella tired, I "feel" great.

This weekend I had my first four wheeler ride! I may be sheltered, but after a talk w/new guy about the state of our "relationship" we decided we don't see each other enough. (duh) And he'd been too busy wondering whether or not I was "the one" rather than enjoying our time together and seeing where it lead.

And boys say GIRLS are confusing. He's really hung up on the kids thing, which I said I'm not like most girls, who would have a baby at any cost....I want the whole shabang, the love, the husband, happy marriage, laughter, respect, the house, and THEN the kid. I don't want any one without any other.

I have been with guys I thought about having a baby with. Well two. My ex husband, and that asshole exmanfriend of mine. I don't think I'll feel incomplete without having one. But for me, its an extension of my love for someone..not something I feel the need to do to validate being a woman.

It was an awesome talk, which was followed up by him asking me to spend the day with him on Saturday. He took me on his four wheeler, which I thought would scare the crap out of me, but I ended up having so much fun! We went fast, and I got muddy, and subsequently, some bruises.

Then we spent the day with a couple that he's friends with, he made his deelish homeade mac and cheese, and we played cards.

Which by the way...we won. Not only do I have a uechre partner again (I've missed playing so much!) but we're a pretty good team!