Monday Schmonday Big Fat Sundae...

So, I inadvertently quit my second job this weekend. How does one do such a thing? I switched 2 shifts with girls who wanted my hours. I thought this wknd was one of them. I was cleaning my laundry room and at 6:00 I went to check my phone and I got a call at 3:05. Apparently I was suppose to work 3-11. I never called them. I felt bad all weekend about it, but then I thought it's a sign because I'm tired of working my life away. What's the point of having money, when you can't enjoy having it? I'm not entirely sure what I'm gong to do. Get another job? Find a sugar daddy? Who knows!

I made only the best smoothie ever in my smoothie maker. Ice, Orange juice, bananna, nonfat vanilla yogurt and a dab of sugar free strawberry preserves. A meal in a cup! Quite Tasty! Deee licous! I should start selling them, their that good m'kay?

This Friday the 13th, when I got out my Friday the 13th Box set, from Crystal Lake to Manhattan to watch, I thought to myself how much I miss my ex-ex boyfriend. He bought the best gifts ever. Seriously, I got flowers all the time, and the gifts he got me weren't generic and cheap. But, in all other aspects he was pretty much useless. So maybe I didn't miss him after all. I just miss the stuff. Sometimes I can be a super big bitch. Sometimes.

Someone has a mouse living in her garage. I say a mouse, because I don't want to think about the possibility that I'm infested. At Christmas, I noticed my santa gourd was missing half his beard, and it was obviously chewed off to be used for mouse bedding. I have 3 boxes of crap from when I was unjustly let go from my job, in the garage. I got in there to get my computer speakers out and noticed a package of instant oatmeal chewed open. My brother said I should put a mouse trap out there, and I said mouse trap? I've got FOUR FREAKING CATS! Hopefully this keeps the mice from getting in my house! Farmers always said female cat urine keeps mice away. I told him I thought traps were inhumane, and he said "so you would let your cats
torture the mouse to death?" Yea, cus that's called nature. And I don't have to pick up a dead carcass that way either. We all win.

Did you have a fabulous weekend? I went to 80's night. It was metal bands of the 80's. It was raining ice. Super. It's freezing cold, and all our vice presidents are on a freaking cruise to the carribean. Yeah, I know...it blows. So, a retarded boy tried to pick me up this weekend. I don't really know that he was retarded, and for some reason I vaguely remember him trying to pick me up before, but with my track record, it could have been anyone, anywhere. I attract the most interesting characters. He was out on the dance floor, dancing to the beat of his own drummer, all alone.

He introduced himself to me, and asked me my name and I think was asking me to dance when my brother came back and rescued me. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do about a second job yet. I think it's a sign that my 10 grand is on it's way. I'm thinking it's way into my hands. I havn't not worked two jobs in years.

Tossing and Turning it Over to the Cats....

I sure didn't sleep well last night. Freaking cats. Sometimes they annoy me. I sleep in a queen bed with 4 cats and a dog. Since I've been living single, sometimes one or two cats will sleep on the spare pillows, and leave my head alone. But the dog owns that pillow 99% of the time, and still, there is generally a push fest between at least two cats, involving my head.

They like to nuzzle my face with their whiskers. Purr. They have to put their paws in my face, and touch me. If one does, then the other does. As if to say "No, I touched her last". "No I did". It's so fabulous to be adored. Then, I hear the dog rustling around on the newspaper I put down to deter her from peeing on the floor. I got up and caught her crapping! I put her outside, tried to go back to sleep. More of the same. Assaulted by cats. I put up with this crap until 2 am, I couldn't fall asleep. So, I relinquished my bed to my pets. I slept on the couch.

I know you think this is pathetic, but first I did try to lock the cats out of the room. But then they just scratch and paw at the door until I couldn't stand that anymore either. Do you now see, how much my pets run my life? I might need therapy or something. You know those assholes followed me out to the couch, and proceeded to bat around the catnip container. I had to take it from them, but by then they were already stoned. They chased each other around and on top of me until about 3 am.

I dunno about me sometimes. Who on earth does this shit? One might say that I should be a vet, but watching E-vet interns last night, I remembered why. Sometimes they die. And, you have to tell the owner. And the owner is a man, who is bawling over his poor dog that died. It tore my heart out. Not for me. Uh-uh.

New girl update:
She is going to school, and majoring in shakespear. Majoring. Who does that? No one I know thanks. She also likes dancing with the stars. Lots of people do, but she said she likes to go to the ballroom dance competitions. She also actually said she wanted to go to one of our stores (not our employee store) and buy something at full price, because getting the discount seems so "unethical". Shut. The. Hell. Up!

Walk Like a Man...

So, the past few nights, I've dreamt that I am a man. I think I'm still suppose to be a girl, because the fact that I'm growing a go-t confuses me, and I'm not that happy about dating women. Unless I'm a gay man. I wonder what the fuck that is suppose to mean?

I blame that show Work Out, because that Jackie is a lesbian. But, she doesn't look or act like your typical lesbian is usually portrayed. Aside from the making out with women. And, how she turns one of her employees to the other side. I dunno. Maybe I secretly have the hots for her, and I'm dreaming I'm a man? Whatever, I don't pretend to understand!

Guess who I think are the assholes of the week? People who hit fucking geese in the street. I mean, their geese, they waddle. It isn't like they jump out in front of the car, and suprise you. I have no respect for people who kill an animal instead of barreling over a cliff, or getting stuck in a ditch. They are what matters most. I don't care if they crap all over, or hiss at you. If you havn't guessed it, I've seen a lot of dead geese on the side of the road lately.

So, one of my new friends at work has turned in her notice. She's leaving to be home with her kids. Betch! She is my bestest work friend, we are so much alike, and we crack each other up. Cus...we're freaking hilarious! So, they hired this new girl. And I know I'm suppose to be positive and whatnot, but I dunno. This chick is too nice. She's nicely annoying. Or annoyingly nice, I mean. Send help.

Hippotus Hoppitus...

How was your easter? The easter bunny didn't come to my house, but that only means, I wont gain any weight, so I'm fine with it. I'll miss the reese's eggs. And Starburst jelly beans. And frozen peeps. And pastel M&M's, and Dove eggs. But, I'll survive. My ass will thank me later!

Me and my brother went to Chili's for Easter Dinner. Lots of people eat out for the holiday. I had me some chicken tacos, and a big ass margarita. It was the shit. And, I didn't stress out. I didn't break a sweat cooking. I didn't wonder what I'd make. I didn't spend $100 bucks on one meal. I didn't wash a dish, or sweep a floor, or wipe a counter top. I think this eating out thing is the way to go! Plus, I have leftovers for dinner tonight! Bonus!

I got somewhat tipsy on Friday, but I deserved it since I've gone virtually weeks without a drop of alchohol which is good for me. I met kat and some folks at the bar for a drink. But, that's after I had a bottle of wine and colored eggs with CP. Oh yea, by tipsy I mean I puked a few times. Nice. It was the wine, and the shot, and the beer. Never do the last two with wine. You would think I'd have learned a lesson or something.

Coloring eggs was so much fun. I havn't done it for years! I made my Mom a craked yellow one, since she's still got pins in her arm. She called me a bitch. Bitch. I made one for each of my family members with stickers. Oh, we shrink wrapped some too, that was fun. Eating them was even more fun. I forgot how delicious they are. Even better, is that I made the perfect boiled eggs thanks to Martha Stewart. I always over-boiled them. Bring them to a boil, turn them off, wait 7 minutes, rinse in cold water. Brilliant.

Guess who kicked her brother's ass, and broke her own record at silverstrike bowling on Saturday? Yep, that's right, ME! I got a 190, cus I rock. Kat cheated and had the guy that works there and posesses the high score help her. You know cheaters never win, and she didn't! We took some boy home that lives by the Circle K. He kept trying to get me and my brother to come over to play Foos ball, and drink beer. He was really drunk. But it was my neighborly duty to drive him home. And we all know I'm the bestest neighbor.

My new most favorite thing in the world is vanilla non-fat yogurt, with grape nuts in it. It's even better with frozen strawberries. I can eat a big ole thing of it for 100 calories. Mmmmm. Delicious! I also only took off Friday from working out. Normally I take off Friday and Sunday, but since I'm awesome, I worked out yesterday too. I'm starting to finally tell a difference after all this time. And it feels fabulous!

Compassion-Less....

I lack compassion. Well, for people, that is. I know this, and I'm able to admit it. It never really bothered me, until I started wondering why I didn't like myself completely. I've done so much therapy, and self help, and I think I've gotten to a point where I just settled for myself. I want to be a more compassinate person. How do you do this when you think most people are stupid? And want a pity party for being dumb? That's why I'm reading about buddhism. It's mostly about living with compassion. I'm not going to turn all Richard Gere, or anything...but I like the believe that we are responsible for our own destiny, and no "God" is going to hand it over.

I believe that you have the power to change your own life. Often people expect great miracles to happen to them. While feeling sorry for themselves. I've been to the bottom, and I fought my way back. So, to me, there are no excuses. Shut up, and fix your freaking life, right? I can spot this in anyone.

So, you see, I don't feel bad for others. This is my struggle. I push my life experience onto everyone else. I know better, so you should too! I did it so you can too. I think I'm pretty hard on people. Me?

This caught my eye:

"In this life miserliness causes us suffering. It is a tight uncomfortable mind that leads us to isolation and unpopularity. Giving, on the other hand is a joyful mind that leads us to experience wealth and abundant resources in the future. There is no need to cling to our posessions, for wealth acquires meaning only when it is given away or used to benefit others"

It goes hand in hand with The Secret. The law of attraction. If you are giving, you will attract that to yourself. If you are caring, you attract that to yourself as well. The book also states that you should spend time doing what you really enjoy, because that will bring more of the same into your life. Even if it's spending time with your pets.

Pets? I think this is why someone is always trying to pawn a cat off on me. I loves me cats! I really enjoy all there is to caring for them, and they give me love in return. So, the universe says, "hey, this girl really loves cats, let's give them all to her". Now, the universe needs to bring me my money, to help me fund my animal shelter, and I can really be helpful!

Sorta Random Bits...

I gave my doggie her bath and, got her bedtime treat and said lets go to bed! I also use this phrase in the morning when she knows that "go to bed" in the morning means go down in the laundry room for the day. She's now 11, her birthday was yesterday, so she's not as spry as she use-ta be, so she got all excited, and hopped down one step, and I said "no" and she
stopped, then proceeded to fall the rest of the way down the steps!!

All I could do was watch her twist and turn and try to stop herself, til she hit the bottom, did a roll, and got right up and shook it off. Thank God she didn't break a bone. It was probably the scariest thing to happen to me in a while. My poor little punkin head! I told her, she'd feel that in the morning. You always feel fine after an injury until you sleep on it. Suprisingly, she seems to be perfectly fine. Phew!

It snowed and iced last night. You couldn't tell from looking, but the roads were horrific. There was 6 accidents just on the way in, and all over on the radio. The poor daffodills have all wilted and fallen over. That's life in the heartland! Gotta love it!

I signed up for classes at work. I dunno how other places work, but I always had to to go Cleveland for any training classes before, outside the company. We have an entire department dedicated to training employees. How fun is that? Just a walk downstairs. The first one, is an entire four hour class....about our mission statement. I wish I were kidding! Mission statements remind me of Jerry McGuire. I also have to take one on how to be partners with our employees in "the field", and the last one is team diversity. After that I can take fun stuff, like more programming classes. I'm gonna be an even smarter cookie.

I really want to buy a new mattress. And, by "buy" I mean charge it. I'm also really thinking about quitting that shit part time job. But that would mean I have to work all I can for a couple months, and Put every penny I earn towards paying off a credit card. I have one that is only $500. I would be so happy to be rid of it! That's an extra $50 a month I'd have. And, last time I quit my part time job, I really regretted it. I was also pulling down about $800 a week.

So, did I get any sleep yet? Well, I had a nap from 8:30-9:45. I fully intended to just walk for 30 minutes, then shower and nap. But once I start working out I psyche myself up and say, I'm already doing it, what's 15 min more? Or, why not still do crunches? You'll feel better tomorrow. So, by the time I do all that and get a bath it's 8:00. When I went to bed at the usual midnight, I tried reading to make me sleep. Only, I couldn't sleep because I was afraid I'd pee the bed. So, I
was up every 15 minutes peeing. Then, my usually adorable pile of cats on the pillow annoyed the shit out of me. I kept moving them, and they'd come right back.

**Now, on to LOST! Don't continue if you didn't watch.....**
I thought this episode was friggin' awesome! I loved how Kate had a connection to Sawyer thru his baby momma. And who doesn't know, that Juliette intentionally got left behind, as a spy. Hello, Ethan? But, it's going to get interesting having her at camp, driving Kate mad with jealousy! Maybe she'll kick her ass again? Hurley's attempt to get Sawyer to be nice to everyone seemed to be the only thing to make him happy the whole show. Too bad it's going to be heated when Jack gets back.

And, the monster. Ummm, it's never done that thing before, with the light. Obviously this is some important info to remember. Juliette knows what it is. I can't wait til Sayid goes all Henry Gayle on her ass to get the info from her. Can't wait til next week!

Theres A 'P' Running Down Your Leg..

I had my review at work. Well it's not technically a review, as no pay increase was involved, but still, I got to hear what a fantastic employee I am. My boss said that she remembered from my interview that at my last job, I left the department because my boss wouldn't give me a chance to advance. She wanted to be sure I was happy so that didn't happen here. She said she gets the feeling I don't want to get bored in my job. I could tell she wanted to say "I know you don't want to just be a secretary". I told her that I like diversity, and once it becomes routine, I might get bored. She told me there are lots of opportunities if I wanted them, to do more reporting, and analytical projects. I told her I was very interested in that. I miss working on the website at the old job, and figuring something out on my own, and feeling accomplished!

She told me she was willing to teach me all sorts of things, and that one of my VP's is also willing to do the same. When he asks me to do things, he explains the background, he says he wants me to know all I can about the company. I'm about to be a fantastic asset! I don't get a pay increase until February, but I look at it as I have that much longer to learn more, and earn a bigger increase! Of course, I also got to hear how impressed she was with how fast I caught on to the way things run, and how well I document my job.

I'm not ashamed to admit this, considering how tired I've been. Last night, I woke myself up at 3:15, peeing the bed. I get up every night to pee at 2, and 4. I didn't wake up at all until then. I blame being so exhausted, yet unable to allow myself to rest! I took the night off working out last night to have dinner w/CP, but I still stayed up all night. I can't allow myself to go to sleep early. Cus then I feel like I'm living to work. So, I had to take all the bedding off at 3:15.
And remake it. I realized, I only have 2 sets of non-flannel sheets. I think I need to keep an eye out for a sale.

Here it is Wednesday, and I'm still not recovered from working that freaking weekend shift from hell. You know, I hear that I can have my old job at Taco Bell back if I wanted it. If I did that, it would be the fifth time I went back. I bet I could make more money there. It's further away from home. Free food. Ugh, the public. Better hours. Good exercise. Kids today are so lazy, and I might have to kill one. Well, it's something to think about. That would be a hoot to tell the police station, um I'm leaving, cus I can make better money and get better hours doing fast food.

I brought a ring to work to get some work done. It's a diamond cluster ring, from the ex-husband. I tried to sell it, but they only offered me $50 for a $500 ring at the jeweler, so I'm just going to keep it. I'm having it rodium plated, so it'll be white gold, and sized a little bit, and it'll be my "right hand ring". I get a discount on special orders and repairs, which I just found out, so I'm taking advantage.

Since I know you all care, my TiVo has fixed itself. The time is now correct. Rejoice.

When Time Can't Go Fast Enough.......

Good Godfrey, I'm freaking tired. You know working that shift on the weekend throws my week all to hell. Friday I worked of course, my 8-5, then 11p-7a on 2 hours of sleep.

7:15am arrived home, and I decided it would be a swell idea to get some shit done before I went to bed. I carted down my trash, cleaned out my car, and by the time I let the dog out, cleaned up her shit, and fed all the animals, it's 8:15. I'm wide awake.

8:15...I get the dumbshit idea, to workout. Might as well, I knew I wouldn't feel like it when I got up later Saturday afternoon, and I had to work off the chex mix, and energy drink binge I was on. I thought I'd just walk for 30 minutes, and be done with it. Thirty minutes turned into 45, and then I still did weights and abs. What time is it now?

9:30.. Hm. I decided to watch some TV, and throw a load of clothes in. I kept calculating my 5 hour sleep time by the hour. Ok, It's 9:30...if I go to sleep now, I can get up at 2:30 and then I'll have 8 hours until I have to go back into work.

10:30. No, I'm not asleep yet, but I'm on my way! I finally got into bed.

11:30 Time for a hot bath, because I couldn't fucking sleep. Brilliant idea working out right before bed. I started dozing off in the tub, so I got back into bed.

12:00 If I go to sleep now, I can get up at 5, and then I'll have 5 1/2 hours until I go back into work. Sleep finally came.

3:30 The ex Z called me. from Arizona. I only answered cus it's the fourth time a Rhode Island number came up on my phone. (I know, the two don't make sense to me either) Apparently he is driving cars cross country.

4:00. Kat texted me. Am I home? Yes. I'm sleeping.

4:30. Wide awake. Ever see that movie, Fight Club? I'm now thinking, Tyler Durden is out collecting body fat to make soap while I'm stuck at home counting the seconds until I fall asleep again.

4:45. Still awake

5:00 Got out of fucking bed, because obviously, I wasn't meant to sleep. I got three and a half hours of sleep. Add this to the 2 I had before work Friday night, and I have been up for.....uhhh....2 plus 2 is 4, 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour, carry the two....mmmmm...well, a really long freaking time. Since 6:45 Friday morning.

6:30 Kat came over to show me her new car. We ended up at Starbucks, next door to where one of my exes works. He was there, you couldn't miss his big ass. I got a carmel light frappucinno. Yum. We also got the wrong drink, which Kat sucked some whipped cream off of, and got to keep it. Pretty good tactic. Only, neither of us wanted it. We saw that the ex got into a new truck. A new, UGLY truck I might add. He never did have good taste. Shit, except in women, but that goes without saying.

7:45 Walk past the cell phone store where said ex works, and I see my old friend Steph inside! Me and Kat went in to talk to her. I knew her since like, 1980 something. I havn't seen her for like 8 years! Small world!!

8:30 Arrive back home. Wash my hair. Think to myself..."self, remember how back on Leave it to Beaver, and Happy Days, washing your hair was a perfectly good excuse to stay home? I wonder if I could call off work, since I am in fact....washing my hair?"

9:00 Give the dog a bath.

9:15 Blow dry the dog

9:30 Clean the rabbit cage

9:45-10:30 I didn't do a damn thing but watch The Ghost Whisperer.

10:30 Circle K. Need. Energy drink.

11:00 Work.

7:00 am on Sunday lather, rinse, repeat. I'm a walking zombie. The only thing I can say good about working midnights, is the phone barely rings, and just about the only people that come in are either; a)picking up a drunk b)wanting to bail a drunk out of jail, and I send them to the jail, or, c)drunk themselves, coming to pick up a drunk friend, and wind up having to sit in the lobby and wait for another friend after failing a field sobriety test at the police station. People are so flipping stupid. The best part is the entire place is mic'd and I can hear their stupid cell phone calls.

So since I slept all day yesterday I was up until 2 am and back up at 7 for work. I had a cappuccino for breakfast. And a Starbucks Frappacinno for lunch. I'm losing steam pretty fast. All for $8.25 an hour.

Would It Be Like A Needle In a Haystack?....

Geez, Friday night I had to go back to be a witness in an OVI. Shit, I felt so bad for the kid. He was really young, and shaking so bad the whole time the officer read him the statement on drugs and alchohol testing, he was trying to hold it together. It was my first "witnessing" where I had to sign that he was read the rules, but the whole time I just thought, that poor kid. I guess I wouldn't think that if he'd hit and murdered someone with his car, but still. I usually do sympathize with the wrong people. Thats my problem.

I dunno if working 11-7 is the graveyard shift, but it sounds good to me. I'm pretty much dead when it's over, after working 8-5 already. I tend to miss all the good stuff at work, but this happened on Tuesday. I'm kinda glad I missed it, cus from what I hear it was a madhouse at the po-po station. Apparently the local Roger's Jewelers, which is one of the companies my full time job owns, was robbed! Four guys came from Detroit in a rental car, to steal a $30,000 ring, and I guess tried to get a $20,000 ring as well, but the sales clerk fought them for it. They stole a car from the mall parking lot, to get them to their getaway car, which was what gave them away. They fled the car leaving it open, and got into another car, witnesses called the police.

I guess it was a big ordeal. They came to the station to do the news, there's a video, I don't know the highway patrol, just the officers in it. and it was in the paper.

Anyhow, the funniest part about it all, was that they couldn't find the ring, apparently, dude swallowed it. He was feeling sick, so they suspected that's what he did, and they called in 'sanitation workers' to keep an eye on him, and retrieve it. It still had the price tag on it. How do you get THAT job? Unfortunatly I couldn't find the article to link, but I'll rewrite the best part.

"To recover the missing ring, the Stark County Sanitary Engineer had to be called in. At about 4:15 p.m., sanitary workers sucked the ring out of Turk's toilet. There was little doubt that the ring was part of the mall heist, according to the Sherrif's department, because it still had the original price tage on it"

When I think of an engineer, I think of someone building something, or flying to space, not digging thru shit for a ring. Not much happens around here, so a good shitting a diamond ring story, is big news! I wonder if they'll re-sell that ring? A girl at work told me that the next day when the lady whose car was stolen from the mall came to pick it up, she had a can of lysol. She told her "I'm not getting in that car until it's clean, criminals were in it" her husband, she said, was clearly embaressed by this statement.