"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Sunday, October 30, 2011


Did you have fabulous Halloween festivities?

The angel and her handsome shih-poo. (he just looks scared, he really wasn't)

A drunk angel

All in all a fabulous night with my lady friends. Who all told me I was going to meet my future husband at one of the parties we were attending. Then, when I did actually meet someone, I was whisked off, just like Cinderella from the ball...only instead of my pretty furry shoes, to leave behind, at that point I was wearing my house slippers. The girls made me go to a lame party with some political people and promised to take me back, but that didn't happen.

I was cock blocked by my own best girlfriends. I think being in relationships, has made them forget the importance of socializing for the single girl. I need to find some single people to hang out with!

So instead of a night of passion...I ended the night snuggled up instead, with Magoo in Moms guest room. I guess things could be worse.


Friday, October 28, 2011

The Great Pumpkin...

I spent my Thursday at my friends new fancy old house. Her husband made us a delicious dinner, including but not limited to baked fries that he cut himself and they had like rosemary or something on them. I had a couple, but not many. I wanted to eat them all. They even got me some Moscato! I told her I may be "stopping by" more often. She moved way closer to me. Which is awesome!

While he cooked our dinner for us (she married well) we drank wine and watched part one of the Halloween American Horror Story again. (so, are you watching yet??????) Her big spooky house added to the ambiance! It is very reminicent of the Horror Story home, minus the ghosts. (I hope!)

Then we carved pumpkins. While asking..."when was the last time you remember carving pumpkins?" It had been far longer for her.

I thought, how very "Martha Stewart" I looked in this photo. Although I may dream of folding my fitted sheets like Martha, I am totally no home-keeping (a Martha term) genius!

So then I showed the real me. A knife weilding pumpkin dominator! Actually, she told me to "look attractive", I said "I'm wearing my Goodwill top"...so, I am not so sure that I made that happen here.

My pumpkin is the most unfortunate looking one, with the bad-ass mouth. She kept asking if I was taking it home. I live in the ghetto. Some crackhead would probably try to smoke it. Really, I think she was a bit embarressed to put it outside in her fancy neighborhood. But then, she was the one who wanted to carve one with a penis motiffe.

I think this should be our annual tradition, drinking wine and playing with knives. I mean, what else are the child free to do with their scores of free time, clean houses, and infinite finances? /bragging.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Halloween Extravaganza's...

There's my handsome boy, Mr. Magoo sporting his Halloween t-shirt. He will be wearing this to his rescue party at One of a Kind Pets rescue this Saturday. This is the rescue that saved this precious boy from eminent death. When I ran my 5k this past weekend (with Bronchitis, cough..cough) for the rescue, the girls all remembered him from when they rescued him. I'm pretty excited to take him to the facility so all the people who cared for him before I adopted him, can see what a handsome boy he has become!

Momma's also attending a Halloween extravaganza this weekend, and after years of hating to dress up, I am actually sporting a costume this year!!

I am (as in waking life) going as an Angel! I found the cutest "sexy angel" costume at the Goodwill, and I am somehow going to incorporate Charlie Sheen....so I can be a..."Charile's Angel"...and maybe it wont be so plain.

What are your Halloween plans???

P.S. I went to see Paranormal Activity 3 with my girlfriends at one of the city's oldest (and scariest!) theaters after a few at home cocktails, and the full bar at the venue (vodka, soda's...anyone?) ...my deduction was it was as good as the first two! Except if you had to pee in that ginormous theater... on your own....then it was super scary!

We all noticed, though, that several of the scenes that were shown in the trailer, were not even in the movie. So...we felt ripped off!

Did you see Paranormal Activity? What are your Halloween plans?

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Old Bird...

Friday night, I went to see Paranormal Activity 3 with my lady friends at the local theater, which is 1 screen, and about 100 years old, and has a full bar. Needless to say, we had some cocktails beforehand, a couple at the theater, and pissed ourselves while watching the movie! Did it change our lives like some of the trailers promised? Um, no! But, it was definatly a must see in the trilogy, and a fun night out with my girlfriends!!!!

I spent my Saturday helping one of my best girlfriends scrape wallpaper from her new house, and paint the walls. It was hard work, but I'm excited to see how it all comes together, since probably the next time I am there, she will be moved in, and the rest of the work will be done. (unless I'm enlisted for more help beforehand....)

When I got home, I poured a glass of wine, and started a ginormous pot of chicken noodle soup on the stove, with beans, split peas, beans, whole grain noodles, and a miriad of other vegetables.

I picked out my Saturday night movie, Pumpkin Karver, (a syfy tivo movie) and fed my Mr. Magoodle the dark meat from the leftover rotisserie chicken.

I am enjoying the delicious smell of my house, my comfy pajamas, and a scary movie! I am so happy for fall to have arrived, I really couldn't ask for more!

Thursday, October 20, 2011


Since my most favoritist show in the world Lost went off the air, I've been wandering around aimlessly from show to show, half heartedly watching week after week. Feeling unfulfilled. Wondering if there will ever come another scripted show that peaks my interest.

Finally! It happened!

American Horror Story!

Whose watching? What do you think? What do you love? I watch each episode about 5 times, and they never get old.

Finally, a show that makes me giddy, and spend time talking about at the water cooler!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Little Red Corvette...(or white fusion...)

I have long since been afraid of the trusty Stratus' wonky struts, wobbly wheel, and lack of power steering, and ability to burn thru a set of brakes, and tires like nobodies business! But I was still sad to see her go.

A nice couple wanted to buy her for their daughter on the lot and then the sales guy told her she was on a trip, to the scrap yard.


I said but she's a nice car, someone could fix her up, she shouldn't be thrown away. I've never been so attached to a car before. She served me well.

And then I drove off in my new ride! She's an 09 Ford Fusion, Dad would be proud, Built Ford tough! He tried to sell me a flashy Mazda 3 which I adore the look of but I said no foreign cars for this girl!

The best part is that its super smart and comes with that talk thing where i can talk to her and she does stuff like dial my phone and text, and sirius radio. None of which I have the first clue how to use, but I'm sure a smart boy will happen along and learn me the ropes. Or...I could read the manual.

But! My payment is only $15 more a month, and I can park anywhere I want without worrying about getting back out due to my lack of steering.

And, I am enjoying one of my very last bottles of wine tonight, sick and all....in celebration.

Guess what? My insurance actually went DOWN 150/year on a newer car. Hells. Yea. I knew this was a smart grown up car!

So it works out to be exactly what I have been paying on the old car! score!

Yay. Me.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Down with the sickness...

I've been pretty lucky sick-wise since I started eating healthy. Unfortunatly when I thought I had the stress poops, I'd actually caught a roto virus, which I think the name "roto-rooter" came from because it attacks your pooper. I'd literally put food in my mouth, and immediatley the gurgles started, and it came back out. How in the world does that happen? I wish I knew.

I just got over that and now I have bronchitis. I miss work. And I'm craving bad food to eat. Subsequently, a week of no workouts and eating things like, hormel canned chili, macaroni, chipotle, a 2 liter and 3 20oz sodas, and McDonalds, has put 6lbs on me. In. A. Week. Not even, 5 days. All I can say is that I hope that it all comes off when I'm back on the wagon next week.

Mr. Magoo is a great sick buddy, but he can't make me soup, pet my head, or bring me water. And I miss having an official "boyfriend" for those things. Even though TDH has offered several times, we're not at the "you can see me at my worst" stage just yet. Sometimes my independance gets in the way of believing in chivalry.

I also dislike taking it easy. I have a hard time just laying around. I always feel like I should be doing something. And, tomorrow I have a 5k to run. ITS FOR THE ANIMALS! I'm still going to try and run it. It's only 3 miles.

And you get hot chocolate, and S'mores afterwards which at this point, sounds heavenly!

Monday, October 10, 2011


Who would have ever thought I would be motivating people to do anything other than singing to them "forget your troubles c'mon get happy?"

I'm good at being optimistic. And making people laugh. I have that down pat. But my latest endeavor is motivating people with their fitness.

Tonight a girl joined boot camp....because of me. She introduced herself to the class and said she had wanted to make a change, and had been afraid to do it, and about everything she'd tried, and what her goals were....and then she said it...."I was inspired by her story on the web page (pointing at me!!!!!) and so I signed up".

I said "ME?!" Pointing at myself...then I said......"AAAAAWE!!"

It just goes to show that you never know what you may do in life, that inspires other people to do good things. I joined to change my own life, and find "myself" again. I never thought it would ever impact another person.

But every day, I see that it does.

A coworker makes me call her every day to run in the gym with me, because she wanted to run as fast as me when she saw me in the gym one day after noticing how much weight I had lost. Wait....As fast as ME?!

I have been getting a girlfriend who lost her will to be fit, to come on runs with me. She isn't running, but walking fast, and saying how hard it is, while I do high knees next to her, or jog at a fast rate, quite slowly (subsequently looking like a complete and total jackass....) I plow ahead up hills, and jog in place while cheering her up the long, steep, never-ending trails. Saying "you can do it! You have to walk before you run!"

Out of all the hard work I've done to lose all the "elle bee's", and achieve my personal fitness goals... having that girl say that I inspired her to change her life, honestly felt better than all that**. Something I struggled with for so long, and have overcome, has made someone else believe they can do it too!

**(Ok, so mayyybe it didn't feel better than putting on a size 6 for the first time EVER....but it felt pretty damn good just the same!)

Friday, October 07, 2011

Proud Mom...

Mom's of human kids record first steps, or haircuts, or first words.

Mom's of puppy mill rescues, record seemingly simple things. Like...play.

Two years ago, Mr. Magoo didn't know what kisses, pets, baths, brushing, snuggling, eating out of a bowl, or even a treat was, let alone a toy. The first time he started showing playfulness with me was major. Getting him interested in toys, was not so easy.

Chasing, and retrieving a toy is a big step for a dog who lived the better part of his life being moved from cage to cage being forced to "perform".

Mr. Magoo is a shining example of what a wonderful pet an abused dog will make when you give them the patience and love they so need.

And as silly as this video may seem, to me, it's so big. I love that floppy one eyed dog bigger than the moon!

(the cat exhibiting jealousy is Fozzie...with a short cameo of Pickachu on his way to using the pisser)

P.S. If you look closely near the end at his close up, you can see his "elvis" snaggle tooth that he acquired after having 10 teeth pulled. It's pretty adorable.

Monday, October 03, 2011

One, two, oh, about seven or so bottles of wine on the wall..

Firstly, I so deserved a girls night on Saturday. I had a really nice date on Friday with TDH, which kicked off my weekend of drinking and eating things I had broken up with for many months. (subsequently I remembered why we broke up and we wont be getting back together any time soon, I felt like crap and it wasn't the wine *professional wino here*)

I fired my very first employee on Friday. Despite all the trouble she had caused, and her "secretive" plan to get me fired, (yes, a new person) I still felt horrible. I didn't eat for two days, and crapped water non stop. My ass hurt. (TMI? I'm honest....) I couldn't even work out because of nutrition. I'd have likely passed out, or...shit my pants. Neither of which sounds pleasant!

I'm a nice person. And she.....was not. It's a good story but due to my fear of getting canned over social media, I wont blog it. In short, she violated company policy more than once. With warning.

Now, some photos!

Here's some of the cheese, and my stock pot wine bucket. We had 7 bottles of wine between us, two of which were the giant bottles. I also made Paula Deen's crock pot mac and cheese which was so freaking delicious I wanted to hide it away from the girls and finish it off myself! What the hell was I doing in this photo? I don't freaking know......Perhaps it was when one girl broke my easy wine opener, and I realized I then had to use the kind they use in restaurants, which are damn near impossible to operate. Especially drunk.

You can see that I put to good use my last several weeks of work night drinking (due to the aforementioned firing) and used my old wine bottles for vases.

The idea was to bring your favorite wine and try new things. But it turns out we all like Moscato, and Wolf Creek Wineries White Lies. I also got a reisling, and white catawba which some people hadn't tried.

My friend Stephanie gave me this awesome buddha-glass. Yes, I consider myself a Buddhist. I don't know many Christians that would drink wine out of a Jesus glass with a penis straw (left over from a bachelorette party)...it's probably sacreligious or something for both parties and I kinda felt bad once I sobered up.

Obviously by the look on my face, I'd had enough wine to justify this seeming like a great idea. I almost look crazy. In my defense the balls had later sprung a leak and I switched to a regular old silly straw. Does that make it better to consume alcohol out of a religious figure? It seemed that way.

And this is the group shot we used the auto feature on the camera for, and it took us about 15 tries to get a couple good ones. We were all laughing too much and not paying attention. I spent a lot of the night doing walking lunges because I was reminded by seeing the other girls, that I really don't have an ass anymore.

Are women ever really happy?

All in all it was a great night. It felt good to let loose with the ladies, laugh, act silly, drink lots of wine, and learn that yes....there is such a thing as too much cheese. (I never thought it possible!)

I can't wait until the next time!