"Choosing trust over doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened." -Victoria Monfort

Friday, January 30, 2009

My Insurance Woes...

So, as read in my posts titled about vagina's....I havn't had insurance for 2 years. And, as a result, I've been forced to go to Planned Parenthood for my annual hoo-ha exam. Which, is a totally non-fun thing to do. It's so....ghetto. I guess I'm glad I have the opportunity to go, because I could be riddled with 10 kids. So, go Planned Parenthood, you do a great service! But you suck at bedside manner.

I was so excited when I got promoted because that meant I could afford to pay for insurance. Woo hoo! I had to wait until October for open enrollment. It wouldn't be effective until January. Wait... it IS January, right?

So, why did I have to send in yet another order for birth control pills to Planned Parenthood? And why have they not yet shipped them when my new pack starts on Sunday? Interfere with my sex with the manfriend, I might have to blow a joint up. Seriously. I had to call the place for an hour before someone decided to answer the phone. They told me, they shipped my order out, and I should have it Saturday. They besta hope I do. BASTARDS. I have PMS!

Anyway, back to why on earth am I still going to Planned Parenthood instead of a real live gyno that gives you an actual cloth robe that covers your entire naked body vs. a paper towel to barely cover your can-cans. And talks to you, and doesn't just say "Get naked".

I received in the mail my prescription card. My dental card. My vision card. No medical card. I could get a prescription, but couldn't go to a Dr. to write me one. Surely it's coming.......I wait, and wait. Last week was 3 weeks into January when my insurance was effective, so I ask HR where my cards are. "oh, you have to contact the insurance provider" So I do. They tell me they have no record of my being insured. Wait, but they are taking money out of my check each pay. Sooo...

I try to call HR, they never answer. Is it just my work, or does HR seem to not be very humanely resourceful? I marched my ass over to the department where the girl I just called is sitting at her desk doing nothing. She looks at my file, and says "oh, I don't know how this happened. They signed you up for (insert company name) insurance which is for our field employees outside of Ohio".

Oh, cus clearly, I live in Ohio, and I work in the office, as I'm at your desk...not the field. So here I am still uninsured. Fighting with planned parenthood, to plan my non-parenthood, which isn't very easy to do. Supposedly my new insurance card should be in the mail by the weekend.

Last night, my tivo went out. *gasp*. I happen to love TV. It couldnt locate my satellite. Five years never a problem, now? All sorts of shit. I thought maybe its cus I smacked it the other day. After an hour of configuring and messing with it, I hung out my second story window tossing buckets of hot water on it cus there is more ice on it.

Who fixed her tivo? I did. Who has an addiction to TV...maybe I do. But, it was the premiere of Hell's Kitchen! Fuck off! (Gordon says that I totally wouldn't tell you to eff off!)

Pee-essss: I'm going to three parties this weekend. Fri, Sat, and Sun. Talk to you Monday when I'm exhausted....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Think Twice...

I think I said yesterday that I adopted some plants at work. We got to leave around 2:00 due to the snowstorm, so when I got home I decided to put my time to good use, and like, water my plants.

Maybe someone should call child services because clearly I play favorites. Or, I'm neglectful. Whichever, I suck at plants. As is noted in my plants at home....

Of course, there's 12" of snow in my driveway and I cant get up, so I have to park at a church and truck it up in knee deep snow to my apartment.

I decided since I would get plowed in at the church, I would
take the driveway into my own hands, and use a mop to clear the snow. No, seriously, that's all I had. So I put on two pairs of pants, a goofey hat and my snow boots, and made two good passes down the hill of doom, and here comes the snow plow. Thank god, 30 min earlier would have been nice.

When I got inside and thawed out, my satellite wasn't working, couldn't find a signal. For an hour it did nothing. What was yesterday boys and girls? Wednesday. That means LOST was on. Oh, hell no! I went into my spare bedroom, stepped up on a chair, took out my screen, broom in hand and proceeded to hang out my window and smack ice off of my satellite. I checked the TV...pixelated picture....better! I smacked more ice off, and I single handedly fixed my satellite reception with a kitchen broom.

Oh, did I mention how we left early? When I got to work, everyone had their "boyfriends/husbands" drive them to work. For a minute I was like......"I wish I had someone to take me to work"...Then I said no, I'm independant, I don't need someone to take me to work. I loved it even more, when they said we could leave at 2:00, and I got my ass in my car and left, while the rest of those dumb fools had to wait here for their rides. Is there always a silver lining, or what? Seriously!
Nothing gets in the way of my watching Lost, not even a frozen satellite. I still think I'm awesome. Did you watch? OMG! They are 50 years behind now on the island? Charles Widmore is there? I mean what did you think? Obviously the reason Richard visited Locke as a child last season is cus he told him to this season. I love when you connect the past seasons to whats going on now. That's why you have to watch them all you cant just jump in. I'm such a Lost snob, but I don't care. It deserves such dedication.

So, Miles is a ghost whisperer. Good. Maybe he can see what all those whispering people are saying. And, why is Faraday all "you can't change the future" and yet, he's going around screwing with people to change the future. Arrrgh.

Anyone else believe everyone will still be alive in the end? Hell yea they will. Who's alive we know about? Jin is alive people. Last season, Sun was at his grave, sure we saw him blow up, but then in a flash forward before he died, he was in the hospital when Sun gave birth, w/another woman having a baby. Season opener this year, it's him and his wife with that baby in the first scene.

Trust nothing, the world has been jacked up. That's why their not suppose to leave the island. They affect the future.

A coworker said to me yesterday. She had no idea they were time traveling. I said, did you watch last season? Faraday and the rat? The nose bleeds? The dude on the boat? Desmond calling Penny in the future? What the hell. Clueless. She's a lost cause.

Anyone else annoyed with the pop ups? Those are for Lost amateurs. It's insulting to me. And, here's some more snow pictures. We got a lot of snow.

What else did the snow do? It prevented me from seeing my manfriend. I did however, get to talk to him on the phone. While I sewed my super awesome toga for tomorrow's par-tay!

And, here's some more snow pictures. We got a lot of snow.

This is my back door..

My parking lot/driveway you can't see the driveway of course.

This is out the front door.

This is my drive after its plowed.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Congratulations! It's a....Plant!

Week two. Lost. Tonight. Cant....wait!

Snow. It snowed. This was my drive to work. At 20 mph. It took me an hour and a half. We have like the storm of the century round two coming. You couldn't tell what lane to be in either. I made it though.

Positive thought of the day. While I may not love the snow, I hate sitting in sweltering heat and sweating from merely breathing 100 times more. At least I can bundle up and play in the snow. You can't play in the hot. You're too busy sweating and panting like a dog. The hot kills people. Wait, so does the cold. Either way, I much prefer the cold. You can snuggle under blankets with a cute boy in the cold. It's not as much fun in the hot.

I adopted a plant at work. Actually, I adopted 5 plants. It's my way of helping the company out during these difficult times. Or, something. They decided to save money and have us care for the billion plants in the building instead of having an outside company come in and care for them as done in the past.

The fun part is, I got an actual adoption certificate, and my name goes in my plants. I'm all about helping out. If it saves my job, even better, right? Here's to hoping I don't kill the plants! Now is where I mention that my coworker went in on the adoption with me, and is now leaving me a single mother. You'll notice under the whited out area where MY name is, I stuck paper over her name. Cus, she isn't getting credit for it. I'm going to fix all the plant tags too.

Speaking of single mothers. I oxycleaned my carpets last night. Mind you I clean them weekly as it is. They were nasty. If you never clean your carpets, I wouldn't ever walk barefoot on them. It's gross!

My manfriend sent me a picture of mojo (his new kitty I rescued) at work yesterday and said that she says "Hi". How cute is that? Pretty cute! You can see how we are destined to be together! He said that she's following him around the apartment, so she loves him. You can't blame her, he is pretty cute, and charming! And, a damn good snuggler!

I've been working diligently at labeling my posts. It's quite a task.

*Excuse the camera phone pictures. Until I packed my lunch this morning and found my camera in my lunchbox, I thought someone stole it.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

A Story about Bodily Functions...

Firstively...A winner has been chosen in my fabulous Valentine's Day Giveaway....(drumroll)...

Alexa! From Cleveland's a Plum. Which is awesome because I can wait til the last minute to ship since she's not far away. The only thing better would have been if my neighbor won! But congratulations! Email me at fizzgigabyte@yahoo.com your info, and I will ship out your fabulous prizes next week!

This is a true story. It happened last week. Because I have no shame.

For breakfast I usually have turkey bacon and egg beaters. On this particular day, I had Yogurt and granola from work. (which cost me $5 but that is another story!) For lunch, I have one of three things, on this day I had spaghetti squash, marinara, and kidney beans. I eat it all the time. It's very low calorie and seriously deilcious.

I'm fine til about 2, when I had to out of nowhere have to poo. Now, I learned from a post a couple weeks ago, that most people don't poo at work. All I have to say is, that is totally unhealthy, and when I get old I'm going to have a happy pooper, cus I go whenever I need to go. You just go when it's empty in the bathroom. Like I did on this particular day.

Instantly, I knew I was in trouble, because it was retched. Rank. Horrid. It was like nothing I've smelled before. I know smelly....

When we were growing up a family of possums moved in under our trailer. Mom fed them radiator fluid, and the living ones ate the dead possums, and the stench would come thru our heater vents. Mom had to get the dead carcasses out from under there to stop the stench! We also had a family of skunks move in. And my moms then boyfriend killed the babies with a pellet gun (freaking asshole!) and they all sprayed of course, and I had to go to school smelling like a skunk. (also totally true, and traumatic..) But this stench was way worse.

Then...I passed a teeeeeeny tiny little poof of gas at my desk. Two point 2 seconds later, I was out of my cubicle because I couldn't stand the smell. Coworker says to me...."what's that smell?" to which I start busting out laughing. She got up and went into the hallway "euw, what IS that smell?" I told her, that I had to abandon my own ship because of it. Then new girl asks, "what's that smell?". It made a perfect bee line thru the department.

The worst part was a random person walking thru and asking what the smell was, after I'd sprayed half a bottle of sweet pea bath and body spray....and everyone pointing at me, and laughing. Myself included.

I still don't do this in front of the manfriend unless its an accident. You probably can't tell but I am a lady. If this had been in his presence, I would've had to hide for weeks. I would be horrified. Although he would probably just laugh at me.

I had a gurgly stomach the entire weekend. I think that yogurt was bad. Or, they slipped in that Danactive stuff. Anyway, I'll never live it down. Like they've never farted. Or poo'd at work.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Pressed Ham...

Bootcamp blew the big one.

It blew because I remained the same weight, yet according to my scale which stays in the same spot I have lost another pound. I'm pretty fed up with it. This week, instead of her blaming carrots, and popcorn, it was the fact that I eat brown rice too often.

Uh, no. So, I'm thinking I need to find something heavy enough, but a known weight to weigh before I weigh in weekly. She doesnt have a real scale it is one you step on and its digital and it measures body fat and weight. I'm irritated. I'm taking the week off. For that, and because I can't afford it this week. I'm sick of the pressure. I workout 6 hours a week minimum. And I don't eat anything that's bad for me, (except for the occasional night out....) so there's no logical reason for her scale to say I'm not losing. It makes me think about not eating out of frustration, but that's stupid. I'm still working out, just not at bootcamp. This week. I might kick her in the head. I mean, if you gain weight, you have to pay $2 per pound. How can you make people pay if your scale is a peice of shit?

Friday night I went out with the gals. We had dinner, at Rockne's. I'd hoped for Cleats all week, a big tall beer, and some greasy totally unhealthy bar food. Which after having Healthy Choice soup, spaghetti squash, chicken, and brown rice for weeks, makes you do a happy dance just thinking about!

They were closed. What a total crock of shit. So, I still had beer, but a turkey club instead. I guess you could say the bread is bad, and the fact that I got fries with it was bad. But it's not greasy bar food. Oh well. The beer was fabulous enough! I had four to be exact. Miller Light....which barely passes for beer, but better than nothing. And I don't regret one of them. I didn't gain weight this weekend either.

We hung out at Bruebakers after that. Where one of my friends asked some totally drunk guy to give me and our friend a pressed ham. You can see by the picture that he did it. We laughed until we cried over that one. I tried to talk them into putting a maxi pad on his back cus he wouldn't go away. But they wouldn't.

Later, he asked my friend when she was going to do a pressed ham, and then mentioned that he wanted to molest her in the parking lot. Creep-y. Who says molest? Maybe its cus he was way older? I dunno! Some other dude was totally checking our table out and I told my one friend dude was checking her out. When we were leaving he introduced himself to me, asked me to stay and have a drink with him. I said we were leaving, but thank you, and he said "come on you dont want to have a drink with me ?" I said my friends are leaving they are my ride. Meanwhile, he has hold of my hand. *eeek*

I'm such a total chicken shit. I really don't mind if someone wants to buy me a drink, that's more money in my pocket, but theres a way in asking that makes it seem wrong to accept. I got scared and we left. I'd say the manfriend is pretty lucky I'm that way. I'm so not the flirty type at all!

In other news, I took the new kitty to the manfriend's on Saturday. Her name's Mojo for several reasons. She is right at home there. She slept in the bed with us too. Sunday we went and he bought her all sorts of goodies at the store. He's pretty cute with her and it just melts my heart! Some girls would think that about seeing their man with kids. Me? Its cats. He got her a new bed, and some toys and scratcher, and catnip. She played like a real cat. She hadn't acted very cat like, but now she's in the swing of it.

Oh! Since I didn't get home from manfriends until after 1 am, I didn't have time to do my drawing for the fabulous valentines giveaway! Remember if you want to win to comment, otherwise, I will have a winner tomorrow!! Aren't you so excited? I know I am!

Friday, January 23, 2009

The Company You Keep..

Hey Lost fans. Only we can appreciate this hilarious video I found on Lostpedia about how obsessive we are.....

Monday, Kat came to bootcamp class. It's like her third time. There is probably 50 people in the class now, and it's not that fun cus the new people are dumb and can't catch on to things so we repeat the same shit over and over. Anyway, she made it fun. Guess what else, she's going to Austria in Feb. She pretty much sucks. I asked if she'll visit the home of Ah-nolde but she said no.

After bootcamp she said "I love working out". That's totally mental. I can say that if I don't work out, I feel "down in the dumps" I need the boost you get from doing it. I have to, cus if I slip for a day my whole routine gets jacked up. I feel sluggish, and not to mention, I'll gain 10 lbs in a week if I don't because I was blessed with awesome genetics. I would never say I love it and mean it. I say I love it, to psyche myself up. But....it basically sucks up all my free time. And gives me blisters. And makes me sweat. But I'm not going to be a crickity crackity 80 year old in a wheel chair. I want my body to work for me, not against me as I age.

You know how unhappy people don't like you when you are happy? And want to make your being happy, into their being unhappy because you're happy? Anyone? Just asking. Cus I know people like that myself. And they can pretty much suck it.

Me? I keep good company. Like, the kind of company that carries their froggie onto the couch, kisses him, then snuggles his fuzzy froggy head. How cute is this?

This company is questionable. Fozzie thinks her mother is a pillow. She likes balls too, but that's between her and the manfriend.

It's Friday. I weigh in tonight. If the scale at bootcamp wasn't jacked up , I could be confident in the fact that I lost 2lbs this week. But, I have no idea what to expect. I'm so exhausted from working out and work, I slept from 7-1am last night. So, then I was up til 4am, and back to sleep until 7.

Broken sleep is like no sleep at all!

I'm going out with my girlfriends tonight. Where I shall enjoy a BEER, and some sort of food that I shouldn't have but will enjoy every minute of. If they have pizza anything at the bar, its mine. All mine. Happy Friday!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Survivors Guilt...

Yesterday at work, we noticed heightened security. We have security on premise all the time, walking around, guarding things, patrolling the lots outside. Yesterday, it was like Noah's ark and they were two by two. Something was off.

Then, you noticed people being walked out. Boxes in tow. Crying. Not by security, but by loss prevention employees, accompanied by counselors, all wearing headsets. The sight of the first group of people, shot a pain in my stomach that I never wanted to feel again. This happened to me two years ago. The devastation you feel after 7 years with a company to be cut loose so non-chalant, is something you don't forget. We all spent the day watching our friends, be led out of the building. People you thought would never be let go.

And then, it came. Our department meeting request. By lunch time, the word on the streets was, if you weren't invited to your department meeting, you were being let go. They would meet with the survivors to let them know cutbacks were done in the department. Guess who's name wasn't on the list? Mine. I had hoped lightning wouldn't strike twice, and I wouldn't get laid off again. I spent a long 15 minutes cleaning things off of my computer, running through my head what I would do. Then the meeting organizer's secretary came to tell me my name should have been on that list, that the outlook server went down when she sent it.

*sigh of relief*

Turns out, our particular department didn't cut anyone. I guess because we work with the field, and the vice presidents. There were a ton of changes implemented earlier this week, which as dumb as it sounds are confidential and I'm not gonna risk getting shit-canned for blogging.

The difference between my new job and my old job, is they didn't turn people out onto the streets with no clue what to do. They met with career counselors. They have job placement, severence, extended benefits, and counseling. We also, get counseling this week if we need it. They brought people in for us. It was a sickening day, and one can't help but wonder what will happen next.

Go out and buy jewelry people. It's for the greater good.

The rest of us? They cut some of our benefits, raised health care costs, and no raises this year. I'm happy to have a job, so none of this is going to make or break me.

Pee Ess..
Who watched Lost? OMG! Loved it! It's cool now to look back, like that dude last season building jacob's cabin, and had the nose bleed....now we know its from time travel, he wasn't a ghost he was just there from the past.

The dude in the beginning with the baby? That's totally Jin and his new wife. Obviously they went back and messed with stuff, and hes now with another woman, and never met Sun.

Locke? I think there is two of him. That's why they have to call him Jeremy Bentham. I can't wait to see who else comes back that died on the island!!!!!!

And Hurley's shirt? I heart shih-tzu's? Awesome. Me too.

I can't wait til we can for real time travel. Totally happening.

P.P.S. I really, really.....really, really want pizza. And coke. Coke and pizza. PMS is horrible when you have to drop 3lbs a week or get your ass chewed out.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

You're No bunny til some bunny loves you...

TONIGHT LOST IS BACK! LOST IS BACK! REPEAT, LOST IS BACK! It's been so hard to contain my excitement!

Hey, how bout watching the new prez, who can speak, and inspire people vs. look like a total moron and scare us to death? Loved it!

This is the elusive Boo's. He's my bunny. He's a lil guy who is a netherland dwarf mix. When I got him like 5 years ago from the rescue, they told me he was 5 years old. Bunnies life expectancy is 5 years. I got him to be "husbun" to my then netherland dwarf "Bitsy". (how cute was that name? Bitsly bunny?)

It took me about a month to bond them. You would think that bunnies are these cute and friendly creatures that would love everyone and everything, but they're viscious little shits when it comes to other bunnies. They try to kill each other. They have to be slowly bonded to other bunnies. Plus, they have to be fixed for obvious reasons.

Boo's has outlived two wives. His first wife Bitsy, that I bought (oh, the horror) from a breeder. And his second wife Chelsea, who I also rescued. She was an adorable blue eyed lop. And a dog of a bunny.

Boo's isn't the friendliest bunny in the world. He also has the papilloma virus. His old owners wanted to put him to sleep cus of it. Poor little guy. His butt is always red. That's all. Wheres the harm in that? Which I attribute to his grumpy ways. That and he must be like 300 in bunny years.

You can get Boo's to be friendly with food. This is us the other night, sharing some popcorn. I'm normally pretty good with the bunny diet. But we all need to splurge. His most favoritest thing in the world is raisens.

In people news....coworker knows a guy who works for microsoft. Manfriend said that he cleaned the virus from my hard drive, and that all I needed to fix my computer is a new version of windows. I have put this off cus 1) it's expensive, and b) who the fuck wants vista? Anyhoo, said Microsoft guy says he can put a legal version of it on my computer. I use to have an illegal copy.

If my computer works, I swear I'll change my pirating ways. I know other people who are better at it than me, and don't catch viruses! I'll just get things from them.

bunny noses are kinda cute.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Spare Change...

I filed bankruptcy when my life plummeted into a downward spiral long ago. My husband left me. I fell into a deep depression where I wouldnt bathe or wash my hair, or eat. I lost my job. Had my car repoed. House foreclosed. Filed bankruptcy. Like "they" say, it's out of the toughest times that you find out who you really are. But my point is, does anyone know about the 10 year bankruptcy/credit report thing? Cus, I'm 99% sure it's been 10 years here in 2009 and I want that shit off my credit rating.

And am I suppose to write a letter or something? That whole time of my life is a blur. I don't remember much, which may seem silly but I was in a bad way.

This weekend I tried to rescue a cat. It was outside in the woods. Sleeping in an abandoned dog house behind my house under a tree. It cried at me, when I say kitty kitty...I have been feeding it but it runs from me if I get close. I put a warm snuggly blankie in the house and covered the door with a towel to try to keep it warm. It survived the arctic chill, so good deed done. I have successfully rescued this cat as of last night. And she's living in my spare bedroom. On a warm snuggly bed. With food and water. And a potty. And lots of petting, the way cats should live. It's my goal to have manfriend fall in love with it and keep it. He wants a cat so it's not evil of me.

she's just a little thing, and super friendly!

So, last Thursday coworker turned in her 2 week notice. You know, the one that started the fight with new girl. I have mixed feelings about it. Mainly because I don't like change. Secondly, and more selfishlyI don't know if I'm going to have to do her freaking job forever, or if they will move someone into my department. I should know by Thursday at the latest.

Coworker's last day is at month end. When I'm busiest, and they are busiest. And also, right before all of our district managers come to the office for a week and we have a billion meetings to prepare for. And reviews to compile. And a major project for the travel department that is due. Awesome.

I can't blame her, in her position you don't make squat for money, nor can you really think for yourself or make any changes to anything. Until my promotion I was also actively looking for other employment too. I can't blame her....but most importantly....what about me?

We also adopted 4 plants together, coworker and me. At work, in an effort to save money, they got rid of the plant people. And we were asked to adopt plants to care for so we can still have them. Now, I'm a single mother. I don't want to water all those plants doing the work of a billion people.

In my positive thinking way....I have found the good part of it all. I'm going to be so busy at work in February, that before I know it, it will be March. And that means, St. Patrick's day and green beer, and merriment. What else does it mean? Spring is right around the corner!

Pee. Ess: Don't forget to comment if you want to win a fabulous mystery package that won't blow up or anything. Seriously.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Grown Ups...

I really need to move. I owe 5 years of city taxes to the city I live in. It's not like I am a deadbeat or anything, it's that I freaking have city tax coming out of my checks already, and state, and federal. Why do I have to pay two city taxes? The rule round here has always been, you pay the city where you work, or the city where you live, whichever is higher. For some reason, I also have to pay my city where I live, in addition to where I work. It's a crock of shit.

Plus, I end up owing like 200 bucks. Add to that the fact that I owe around 3-400 to federal, around 100 to state, and you've got a recipe for disaster. Sure, I could have them take more out of my checks, but I don't want them using my money all year and not giving me shit back. I'd rather use it and not give THEM shit back. Relax, I at least pay my federal and state taxes.

Last year they sent me certafied mail and my MOM signed for it and I had to go to court to have my taxes done. Of course, at my house court turned out to be a lady behind a counter who did my taxes and wanted money. I thought I was getting hauled off to jail for sure.

I got another letter this week. Only my MOM isnt staying with me to sign for it, so I think I might not pick it up. I need to move. I think it's complete bullshit.

Speaking of grown ups. I dunno when this happened but it seems like everyone just stopped having fun. And by everyone, I mean people I am use to hanging out with. When you hear me say I do things, it's either with the manfriend, or with the manfriend's friends. I sit and contemplate if this is a sign that I don't need to live close to my "people" because my "people" don't hang out anymore? I don't like that part of growing up. It sucks.

I had a fabulous weekend with the manfriend. We rented 6 movies Saturday at 11pm. We went shoe shopping on Sunday. Guess what? I got new shoes. Guess what else? They are 1/2 size smaller than my previous shoes which gave me hella blisters and corns and whatever else ails my feet. I've always worn an 8 1/2. I tried on 3 brands of sneakers, all an 8. Do your feet lose weight? Even when I was thin I wore an 8 1/2.

I lost 1lb on Friday at bootcamp. Which I think is complete shit. She goes between scales and I weigh myself on mine after, mines 2lbs heavier. Always. I got home Friday and I weighed 2lbs less than I weighed in at bootcamp, meaning I really lost 4lbs. She's pissing me off with that. And..When I weighed in she said "why'd you only lose 1 pound?". I said "gee, I dunno, I work out twice a day EVERY day, and I've dropped two sizes!" So she circled stuff on my list of food. Carrots. And a snack size popcorn. 2 Cups of microwave popcorn. No butter. Apparently when eating healthy you can only eat certain vegetables. Which is the dumbest shit I've ever heard. She's not a dietician.

Don't forget to scroll down to my last post and enter to win a fabulous valentines day prize!!!! If you didnt say you wanted to win, I didn't enter you.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Be Mine...A Fabulous Giveaway!...

First of all....JUMPIN JA-HOE-SA-FAT it is cold. Minus 8 degrees. Wind chill negative 30. Today's high -4. I have compiled a hatred for the cold post. Because it sucks so bad. But that's for another day!
Ok, it's time for me to pay it forward from my Christmas win over at lbluca77's blog. I'm having a Valentine's Day giveaway, where you will receive fabulous prizes. They will of course be valentine's themed, but since I'm cat-crazy you will actually be one of my cat's valentine's. I'm taken. I know, it breaks your hopeful heart and might make you worry about my sanity but fear not.

You will receive a picture of your valentine, perhaps a fabulously romantic movie, a stupid clock I once got for Xmas, and some other stuff that is totally worth winning, even if I havn't purchased yet. But, half the fun is in the suprise, isn't it? And what else, it's FREE people.

How do I win, you ask? Just leave a comment that you want to win. I'd leave a comment cus I rarely check my mail. I'm lazy that way. I'll have a random pick that I will document for your viewing pleasure and everything. I only ask that you live in the US cus I'm too cheap to send stuff any further, and plus, maybe there is chocolates and I am too ignorant to know international mailing laws to send anything.

I'm also ignorant to whether or not there are mailing laws besides no fluids or suspicious powders. You have until January 23rd to enter, because you want to get your gift in time for Valentine's day, right? Especially if you are a boy, so you can pretend that you bought it all and give it to your girlfriend. Especially a romantic movie. I'm pretty awesome if my gift gets you laid.

Plus, I'm a procrastinator so that gives me another 2 weeks to send it in time.

You can't win if you don't enter. I'm not going to force the lurkers to come out of hiding. Even though I've read on several blogs that it's national de-lurker week. I mean, you can if you want, but I understand the excitement of feeling anonymous. And in my 3 years of blogging I've never once urged anyone to speak up. You might be sad you didn't enter though, when you see how awesome it is. I'm just sayin.
P.S. Less than a week until LOST is back!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

My Shit Don't Stink...

I'm going to relate the dumbest shit I ever heard. Besides asking me if boys have a colon....(new girl) . I use to work with a girl who said she didn't believe in the courtesy flush, because poop hits the water, therefore the smell is trapped in the water, no need to flush during a poo so your neighbor doesn't pass out from noxious fumes.

I bet you can guess who always got blamed for stinking up the shitter. I mean seriously. If this were true, no one would stink up a bathroom, doesn't all of our poop land in the water? Does that mean the reason a crapper is still fuming, because someone decided to take a poo on the floor? I'm sure it wouldn't help, but come on. Poop stinks. Period.

I'm helping the world be harmonious. Why we should all love each other: We all bleed red. Put our socks on one foot at a time. And all our poops land in the water. And stink.

Speaking of harmonious this was on Oprah....and I can relate to this 100%....

"Spirituality is an individuals waking up to a dimension of their being, or soul. It is the most real part of us. When one starts to really feel into the spiritual part of their being, they bump into love, they bump into compassion, they bump into beauty, they bump into real peace and real joy. And that begins to be where they live their life from. Real, authentic beings that have a tremendous amount of meaning in their life. Begin to notice what you have in your life that you are grateful for. When you look at life through gratitude you dont see as many obstacles or hinderences, you see potential, you see possibilities, then you become an open vehicle for inspiration, or wisdom, or guidance coming from the spiritual part of your being."

They suggested to start meditation, by sitting quietly for 1 minute each morning. I say this, it's a fantastic suggestion, because you become connected to your thoughts, and learn what your inner voice is, and what inner noise is. I had a very hard time getting past this, and I still struggle at times. Trust your gut.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Let's Be Honest Like Oprah...I Hate To Work Out Too!!...

My flippin feet hurt. Specifically, the part just under the pinky toe. I can't really tell in reflexology what it relates to in the body. Maybe thats the spleen? It's by the kidney on the right foot. Liver? Too much drinking? Ack!

Nah...I'm pretty sure it's in direct relation to the fact that I have had the same shoes for like 8 months, and I put a minimum of 20 miles a week on them, plus bootcamp 3 days a week. I got some gel inserts, and on Monday, they hurt my feet even worse. Tuesday, I had developed new blisters. I was to the point where my old blisters were calloused over and no longer painful.

I swear in a past life I must have been a sheep herder or something, and inherited the love of animals, and sore feet. I mean my feet hurt. Maybe I should stop working out. Kidding. But for a moment I felt a wave of excitement. I wish.

You would think the more weight I lost the less they'd hurt. I will say that I am up to jogging for 15 straight minutes, and no knee pain. Shazam! Yea I know I said shazam, but I think it should make a come back.

I've been snacking ravenously on celery since I can have as much as I want and never gain weight you know, of course I'm eating, but in between meals...celery! The batch I bought was horrible. It's really green, and fibery. What the hell? How does one survive the winter with crappy vegetables. Good thing I bought 4 stalks of it, cus it was 2 for $4. I love to waste money. It's my favorite.

I got a book like this about polish food and cuisine on sale at Borders. Because it has a recipe for peirogis. With Cream cheese ok? Aaaaand potato dumplings. I blame my love/addiction for carbs on being polish. It outta get me something besides stupid jokes, right?

My whole reason for going to Borders, was to get a 2009 calendar for my cubicle. I'm lost without one. I spot a Madonna calendar, for $6. All half off, awesome! I get to work on Monday, and it's not a calendar. It's a thing of Madonna pictures with the dates listed. You can't write anthing in there. its just dates. Not even days of the week.

Seriously? Madonna? You have more money than P Diddy, and you have to rip one of your biggest fans off? I think I'm going to give this in my Valentine's Giveaway. Oh yea, You can enter to win this Friday!

I added my weight loss ticker there to the left. Why? Because I'm over halfway to my goal. The goal set by bootcamp nazi. I've lost 54 lbs. 39 to go. 13 of those are thru bootcamp. But it's nice to know I'm over halfway there!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Bout to be a what? Girl fight!...

Friday I had to wear my supervisor hat, and actually do some mediating. Had a fight at work. Good thing I've taken 10 diversity classes, and a conflict management class. Right? Because I still did what I would do normally do, and didn't apply much of what I learned. I went to the gym to workout, and when I came back, no one was on the "floor" to answer phones. I saw new girl, and coworker holed up in a VP office. I asked them to come out.

Coworker comes up to me and says: can I do new girl's job because I have nothing to do, and she is behind.

Me: I'll talk to new girl about it.

Coworker: New girl is going to lunch cant I do it while she's gone?

Me: I'll talk to new girl after her lunch break, thanks for your offer.

Coworker to new girl: She said no new girl.

Coworker to me: Im going to pray for you because you have a lot coming down the line.


I really don't like when people say they are going to pray for me. It implies that I am doing something wrong, that I need to be forgiven for, or I can't handle my own life. That is MY interpretation.

Seems like they were scheming but it turned out to be quite the opposite.

Protocol is this. I get the girls planner pages every day, I asess their workloads, and if I feel they are behind, I offer help, move work around, or have one help the other. That's why I get paid the big bucks. I will intervene here and say new girl had missed a day of work because her fiance is sick.

New girl gets back from lunch, and I decide to move our one on one (meetings we have to have every week to "check in" it's a corporate thing which is pretty awesome) to right then. I find out coworker pulled new girl into an office after thinking she disrespected her, and told new girl that her stress is affecting her at work, and she needs to watch her personal calls before she gets our privliges taken away. New girl felt threatened, and coworker was being very rude. This went on and on and the bottom line is, coworker had no right to do what she did.

New girl was visibly shaken. I told her never go into an office with a coworker w/o a supervisor, because she has no back up if it escalates. I spent the day smoothing over the mess. The bottom line is coworker was out of line.

Coworker is older than me and new girl, and has always had a problem with my being promoted jussst beneath the surface. We had friction from the get-go. It festers up from time to time, and I think when new girl says things like...do boys have a colon...or debbie gibson is the oldies, and her latest "OMG, Dr. Pepper is good", (never. tried. dr. pepper.ever.) it frustrates coworker. She has no tolerance for people who have different views. We almost got into it one time when I was talking about buddhism. (she's a holy roller, which is her choice and I don't put her down for it) So, we don't talk about it anymore. That is why she got in the "I'll pray for you".

One thing I know, I can't change how coworker views the world. I can only deal with my reaction to it. Ommmmmm......

And, now for some random pictures!

One of the cutest cats ever, is my Pickachu. Here he is with his most favoritest toy in the world his stuffed froggie. He carries it around and cries. This is him biting the froggy cus I think it was a bad froggy. Die froggy, die.

I got this lantern from my Momma for Xmas. I hung it in my bedroom. It's pretty sweet, it holds a tealight. Romannnntic.

This is a not so fabulous picture of my stars. Manfriend got me the one up top, its a mirrored star. One day I'll have lots of them.

P.S. I'll use the force and tell you to tivo Ellen today (if you have real Tivo you can do this online so you have no excuse) because Wayne Dyer is on. I'm super excited. You should be too.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Not So Storm of The Century...And Snow Pics..

I'm sure everyone has a story from the wintery weekend. I don't really. My story goes, it took me 45 minutes to get to boot camp, and I had to wait to take a later class, so I drove home in the storm. If you watched the news you'd think the apocolypse was coming. STAY INDOORS! DON'T DRIVE! HORRIFIC CONDITIONS! IT'S SNOWING!!!! I mean seriously news people, have you nothing better to do? I think we live in Ohio and we are accustomed to dealing with the snow. Isn't the economy bad enough? Let people go out and spend money. I gave up on them, and relied on the weather channel, and the talk of Akron. (local talk radio) where real people gave their real accounts of the real conditions of the real storm.

We got about 8 inches. I was snowed in my apartment til about 4:30 Saturday. I had cabin fever. Not that I had anywhere to go, but not being able to go anywhere if I wanted to...sucks. Suprisingly a plow came to clear our driveway of doom eventually. I was shocked.

The prospect of not seeing the manfriend pissed me off. But, in his true cuteness he escaped the city and came to the country. Apparently, it was way better out my way. Being that we have 2 traffic lights, I think the plows were able to better keep up with the storm. Plus, it mostly snowed at my house Fri/Sat morning. And was still snowing when he left to come over that evening up his way. I think it always snows in Cleveland. Even in July.

Met a new neighbor (we have a fourplex) on Saturday, Tayray's boyfriend (their my neighbors I'm on the end) is outside with him, and introduces me. Asks me where the manfriend is. Then proceeds to say to the new neighbor how manfriend and I wake them up at night....ifyoucatchmydrift and then imitated sex noises, and said "then the bed bangs against the wall". I said "don't be a hater, at least I'm getting some". I mean really. Why call me out in front of someone I don't know? But, I don't care. I have nothing to be ashamed of. And just for that, the manfriend and I not only broke my bed risers (again) that hold my bed up, but demolished them, and then bent my bed frame. Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa................ Pretty much I need a new frame for it to be stable. Not that I'm complaining, it was a fun process!!

Other than that we had fun flirting with each other and being really disgustingly cute. Like, he told me that he's as nuts about me as the first day he met me. And, he told me I could win the most beautiful girl award. (We were watching tool academy, and I told him he was definately not a tool, and could totally win Mr. Awesome...) It's nothing new, he does that stuff all the time. I think that's what keeps us so in love is that we always remind each other why we love the other. I told him that's probably why our sex life is fantastic, because for girls it's mostly mental, and I always feel loved by him. Awwwwww. But I also wanna rip his clothes off and well......you know.

So, the big news. Bootcamp. I lost 3lbs, and have made my first goal set by bootcamp nazi of losing 25% of my goal. I made the first rank which I forget what it is, it's a military term. I lost 3lbs, and I got off the scale and did a dance, and said "yayyyy I made my first goal" and was squealing....bootcamp nazi simply said "you could be losing 3lbs each week".

That was probably the shittiest thing she could've said, but I don't care. I didn't gain weight over the holidays. Which is hard. And she didn't rain on my parade.

P.S. Snow pics for M.E.Rider...who misses the snow. Crazy?

Friday, January 09, 2009

On The Fly

Well, I'm so hella-busy these days that I didn't even have time to post I'm coming live from Thursday afternoon. Thursday came from Tuesday. What the hell? This means:

1) I'm still employed
2) Business is good and we're beating the competition
3) I'll get paid next Friday
4) I should buy myself jewelry from the employee store. But I wont.
5) I'm pretty awesome in general.

Changes about our "Grille" at work I don't like.

1) It costs $1.99 to buy two hard boiled eggs, when I can get a whole dozen for 80 cents.
2) A small plastic (about 12 oz) cup of grapes costs $2.59, when at Giant eagle, I can get a whole pound for $99.
3) It costs me 85 cents for gross coffee, when it use to cost me 50 cents for good coffee. IN MY OWN CUP!
4) They use real eggs instead of egg beaters. Euw.
5) They don't have turkey sausage links anymore. Only patties. And they are gross and have those hard balls in them that real sausage has. *shudder*
6) They have a shelf of fruit in bowls like apples, bananas, and oranges and have a label "large fruit, $.89". But, won't sell me a whole pineapple on that shelf for the same price.

They moved the pineapples. Dicks.

Big news is, my Momma drove home from city hospital to her house. She followed me in her own car. She hasn't driven since her accident. That's big news.

In also big news, the manfriend is having a toga party January 30. If I know you, and you wanna come you let me know (fizzgigabyte@yahoo.com) . Invites will be out later. It will probably cost $10 and you'll get something for that like food. And, the honor of seeing me in a toga. C'mon, that's gonna be flippin sweet! I promise I wont party out early either. And, if I drink enough I'll even initiate the "gator". Hopefully everyone will follow suit. And not look at me like I'm a total idiot.

Oh, and I'm sure that I'm happy it's Friday!

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Listen To Me...

If you ever listen to anything I say, listen to this. Lucky for you, you can watch Dr. Wayne Dyer's (my biggest inspiration for change!) "Power of intention" seminar online, right HERE! Do it now! If you want a change in your life, this is the perfect first step to prove to you that you can. He is inspirational, and you do have the power to change your life. If I can, ANYONE can. His book "Change your thoughts change your life" did just that, changed my life.

Theres a reason I told you to watch it. So do it. Now. Go. And most importantly, believe it.

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

It's a State Of Mind...

You know, you are only as old as you feel, right? I feel like, 18, maybe 21 since I can drink legally and, fork a yard. Yet, mature, as I can sit in a meeting with all the big wigs and say things like "perhaps we should maintain our current direction, and analyze more efficient ways of doing these". But what is good at making you feel old is this.

You are sitting at your desk, sending information across the superhiway a.k.a the internet, for work, minding your business, in the zone...and humming to the song piped in over muzak.

Then you hear a much younger coworker (new girl) pipe up "If they don't stop playing these oldies, I'm going to scream!!"

And, you answer...."But, new girl, this is Debbie Gibson...'only in my dreams' it's not ollllllldies, it's the 80's"

New Girl: "Ugh, I hate the 80's"

Me: Dumbfounded

I told her I wanted to weep for her. How can anyone not like the 80's? It's like disliking polka. Not just because I'm a polish gal, polka is just happy. We have a college station here (Z88) that plays polka on Sunday mornings. It's like the shopping network, if you stop for even a second, it sucks you in.

And, it's not like meloncholy 80's music, it's Debbie Gibson. Come on, that is like against the law or something. It really makes me mad.

Oldies schmoldies. Being older is awesome. I know who I am and I'm not annoying enough to ask a question like..."do boys have a colon?". Seriously, she asked me that. I think she meant prostrate or something, but she asked me if they had colons. Wait, I just proved it's not an age thing. It's ignorance. Ignorant folk don't appreciate Debbie Gibson. Or know that men might be from mars, but they have the same pooping system we do.

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Morning Inflation...

I'm standing at a coworkers desk today and one of the big wigs told me as he walked by "you are looking thin". Yea, me, and thin in the same sentence. This morning I put on pants I havn't worn in like 10 years. But, they are the same number size as I've been wearing but unable to fit into. Said big wig is always in the gym when I am, and is impressed with my stamina. No, said big wig isn't a perv. He helps me when I want to say, eat a peice of chocolate pound cake someone made by saying "3 miles on the treadmill" and then I'm like....after I already did 4? No thank you.

The scale says I'm down 5lbs since my last weigh in 2 weeks ago. Yes, even though I had junk food, and alchohol. I stuck with my workouts! Friday is the true test. I had been away from bootcamp for over a week, because her holiday hours didn't fit my schedule. Last night was pretty tough, I couldn't do all of the knee to elbow things. But that's also due to the fact that instead of dividing my lunch workout between the treadmill and eliptical, I did the eliptical the whole 45, and for the first time I did a level 3. (I've been on one) I did that because there was no available treadmill with a TV. I can't stare at the wall when I workout. I need distraction.

Yes someone hacked my twitter. I'm waiting to see what they are doing about it, their blog said that 30 accounts were hacked. They said they reset them, but they didn't. I find it hard to believe only 30, and I am one of them. I think I have 13 friends? I'm hardly a target. It's ok though, because Obama's was hacked too. I'm sure my life is just as interesting as the upcoming president. For sure.

New shows. Anyone watch True Beauty? Putting all those people in a house with their inflated egos, has already proven to be hilarious. And, makes me glad I'm not one of them. Kat told me about Tool Academy. Which I think everyone should run out and Tivo. Guy's think they are competing for "Mr. Awesome" but really it's to see who is the biggest tool. You said tool.

Oh yea, speaking of shows, today is the new Biggest Loser. I can't waiiiiit!

I'm feeling much better today about my future. I try so hard to live in the moment, and I go along each day that way, and one thing throws me outta wack? I'm back on track, and confident that the universe has something fabulous in store for me. Whatever it is, and however I get there is yet to be seen.

Monday, January 05, 2009


FYI...I'm not stalking you, my twitter was hacked. Who does that?

The theme for today is change. Friday they put access 97 on my computer because I'll be working on a project thats been started in access 97. Nevermind importing it into 2000. What do I know? In the process, I was assured that only the access program would be changed. I logged in to my computer today, and my whole office suite is 97. I dunno about you, but I think 97 is extremely retarded. The computer guy is suppose to fix it. All my files are jacked up, and my email was 2003, and now even its 97.

It's the first day that our "grill" at work has changed. My daily breakfast (1 egg, 1 turkey sausage, 1 slice of toast) use to be 95 cents. Now, it's $1.09. They REMOVED the salad bar. How do you just take away an entire salad bar? The pro's? You can grind your own coffee. The con? It went from 50 cents when you use a special cup, to $1. Inflation. The vending machines are ridiculous too. They have (not that I was buying them mind you) reese's cups for 85 cents. (use to be 65 cents). Worse? They aren't even reese's. They are generic.

And lastley, change with the manfriend. I feel something coming. Today, tomorrow, next week - I'm happy. I'm 100% in love, and couldn't want another thing. The future, has been weighing on me. This weekend, it bothered me when the prospect of owning a home came up. I thought it would be a great opportunity, then quickly I stopped myself and thought...."if I buy a house, that means I'm stuck in Akron....what does this mean for my future with manfriend?"

Manfriend has never expressed a real interest in living together. It's "crossed his mind". It's somthing he wants with "someone" "one day"... "if" it happens for him, not "when". For me it's a "when". I don't want to think about ending a good thing for such a stupid reason, but I have to wonder, is it fair to keep me going in something that may not go somewhere? I don't even know what I want, because I'm not ready today. Tomorrow, next week myself. I just want to know that the option is there. That it's really something that will happen. Not something that is merely a dream. I havn't been bothered by it until this weekend. Now, I am so upset over it. It's consuming me, and I'm letting myself feel it. I was up til after 3 am unable to sleep.

I know everything happens for a reason, so that goes without saying, that this is happening for a reason, and I have to trust that the outcome is going to be the right thing regardless. I can't imagine this not going anywhere. I have to have faith that whats meant to be will be. It's not easy to always be positive.

I need to learn to embrace change.

It's the only constant in the world. That, and death.

Friday, January 02, 2009

It's a New Year.....

I'm still recovering from the new year festivities. I'm not hung over, but I'm extremely tired. Like if I stopped typing I could fall right asleep. zzzz

I partied out early on New Year's. Me. It isn't a shock if I tell you that I had almost an entire bottle of Bicardi Coconut to myself. On a mostly empty stomach. I was feeling pretty good up until we left the manfriends shortly after the ball drop, to walk to the Mar's Bar. Where we did cherry bomb shots, and obviously it's never a good idea to mix liquers. We all wore stupid hats. The boys had on sombrero's, and the ladies had on pimp hats. We were awesome to say the least.

We left there to go to the beer engine. Where I knew I shouldn't do a shot and tried to pretend like I did and everyone harassed me to finish it. Then I made intimate friends with the ladies room floor. Which always sucks balls. I had to go outside and find the manfriend to rescue me. His cuteness walked me back to his place, got me changed and fed me some cocoa cola syrup and tucked me into bed. I'm guessing this was around 1:30. I may have mentioned before that I have the cutest manfriend in the world, but it warrants mentioning again. I'm so not use to being taken care of. I'm use to being yelled at and left to fend for myself. I love that boy!

The manfriend told me I got sick because of this.

I had a billion limes in my drink. I simply didn't take the old one out when I got a new drink. This also means I had
like 10 or so drinks. Mind your business.

He went to the neighbors to play beer pong and next thing I know it's 6 am and he's back with one of his friends. So, I got up and we were up talking, and um.....not talking until 10 am. The talking part was a really good talk about our parents. (ha ha Momma) We snuggled up and slept until about 2, and that was it. A mere few hours of sleep.

We got up and hung out in our PJ's and acted disgustingly in love with each other. I had some keilbasa and saurkraut. We watched a few episodes of Brookhaven obesity clinic on TLC. That pissed me off because some of those people in FAT REHAB were having food delivered to the hospital. I know to each his own, but there were people who wanted to change and couldn't get in the hospital cus those people were wasting time in there. We watched the Changeling (which was awesome!) and Star Wars Episode 2. I didn't want to leave, and of course cried on the way home. I hate it. If I dwell on it, I will get mad at the manfriend for not being ready to live with me. So, I have to let it pass. That's his issue, not mine. Sigh.

All in all a happy new years, I had a blast until I puked. Maybe that should go on my headstone?